5. Baltimore Beauty Pageant

Burlesque queen/co-organizer Trixie Little describes this alternative competition as "glitter-meets-gutter." Which is perfect for an event that includes a Queen (or King) of Crabs, new performances inspired by those scary child pageants and "special guest weirdo" Bambi the Mermaid, straight out of Coney Island. Also, the throne's a toilet. 7 p.m. doors, 8 p.m. show Saturday. Ottobar, 2549 N. Howard St., Remington. $15. theottobar.com
Gabe Dinsmoor/Baltimore Sun
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