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Marriage between a man and a woman has been part of our culture for thousands of years. The gay and lesbian community could remove this issue from the political arena by agreeing to accept terms such as civil unions or partnerships that granted them essentially equal status with married couples.
The next step would be to enact a federal law that provided marriage equality for gays and lesbians. One law could be passed so all 50 states treated all citizens equally. This could be the common sense approach we are looking for.