A marshmallow Peeps movie rolls (slowly) down the line

To those who say cinema may be dying a slow death, have you heard about the new Peeps movie?

OK, so it doesn’t seem like the animated film will actually happen anytime soon. As first reported on Deadline, it’s just one screenwriter (Adam Rifkin, best known for “Mousehunt” and “Underdog” — at least there’s an animal theme) who’s optioned the film and TV rights to the quirky candy and still needs a script, let alone financing and a distributor.

But still. Think of the puns. The branding opportunities, The boom in dentistry. Why, you could practically argue a Peeps movie could save the U.S. economy, one pink marshmallow bunny at a time.

Also, you’d think Peeps won’t make very durable heroes. But how many movies come with Wiki entries for their characters titled “Alleged indestructibility”? Take that, Captain America.

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If an animated Peeps movie were ever to get made, Hollywood agents would bang down the door to land some sweet deals for their clients. Who needs eye candy when you’ve got the real kind? Fans would eat it up. Reviewers would call it colorful.

A potential Peeps movie also highlights something serious: After Hot Wheels and Viewfinder and other movies based on toys in your mom’s attic have faltered, there’s renewed interest in turning household items into cinema again thanks to the wild success of “The Lego Movie.” Not everything is Lego, of course. (Or Barbie, which Sony has just announced as a film.) But if “Transformers” can rise again, and if you really like eating candy, then why can’t Peeps be a film? To not try would leave us feeling...yellow.

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