If you don't count a runway littered with gorgeous half-naked models like Heidi Klum, Alessandra Ambrosio and Karolina Kurkova wearing thongs, corsets, thigh-high stockings, peacock-, pheasant-, goose- and turkey-feather wings, crystal-covered bras, and teetering on stiletto boots and red-soled Christian Louboutin platform heels.
Scary, Sporty, Ginger, Baby and Posh wore WWII-inspired outfits ('40s-style pencil skirts, padded shoulder jackets and blouses with jaunty triangle field caps) for their first song, "Stop." And their enthusiastic performance proved they're still packing plenty of Girl Power.
Compared to today's pole danceresque choreography, the Spicettes' dance moves felt a bit dated. Even though they were light-years ahead of Britney Spears' somnambulistic VMA comeback, their moves looked a little Backstreet Boys-ish. Maybe they should spring for a new choreographer. That up-down shoulders shrug is so last decade, and there were times when they reminded me more of the Andrews Sisters. "And for our next number, 'The Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy of Company B!' "
After a montage of clips showing highlights of their former career -- their arrival in the U.S., kissing Prince Charles, appearing at Cannes -- the girls did a second song that certainly brought the upbeat mood to a grinding halt. Wearing Roberto Cavalli gowns, they sang "Friendship Never Ends" while standing like statues in prolonged fashion model poses. Yawn. Hey, Spicettes! The Angels are up there to pose provocatively, not you! You're supposed to dance!
The best news of the night? Victoria Beckham smiled! And for the first time in years, she looked like she was having a jolly good time. So was the audience, which included Stacey Keibler, Ryan Seacrest, Jeremy Piven, Lauren Conrad, Hayden Panettiere, Eva Longoria, Rebecca De Mornay, Dean Cain, Steve Bing sitting with Brad Grey, and stylist Jessica Paster.
Will I. Am, filling in for Kayne West, who canceled because of his mother's death, appropriately sang his hit, "I Got It From My Mother." Although considering that West's mother died a day after reportedly undergoing liposuction, the lyrics -- "Where you'd get that body, baby? I got it from my mother" -- might not have been the best choice.
Seal, wearing a sparkly silver suit, sang a song off his new album that he wrote for Heidi (on their wedding day). Later in the show, Heidi joined him in a duet of sorts that also appears on the new album. I'd been told the reason Heidi didn't talk to reporters on the line was because she "couldn't talk." But she seemed to whisper along with Seal pretty convincingly. And then they kissed. Awwww.
This was also Klum's big comeback. She'd not walked the VS runway for quite some time because she was busy having babies. And after two kids, she certainly held her own up there, next to the amazingly lithe younger generation of Victoria's Secret Angels.
If you just can't wait until Dec 4 to see the VS show on CBS, here's a preview of the models, the singers and the wild sexy lingerie fashions in the Red Carpet Rewind Gallery.