‘iZombie’ recap: Liv Moore’s a Real Dead Housewife of Seattle

It’s already well established that our heroine, Liv Moore, does not shamble, despite being a member of the walking deceased.

But in this episode of “iZombie,” she positively struts -- in strappy designer shoes, no less, while carrying a statement bag and showing off her fresh acrylic nails and fierce accessories.

Oh, how I adore Liv as a Bravolebrity.

Liv Moore (Rose McIver) may be a tad depressed during part of this hour at the prospect of spending her birthday alone, but she looks consistently fabulous. She even does something with her hair, finally!

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It’s all in service, of course, to solving the crime du jour. But enough of the surface and on to the substance because there are so many revelations packed into this episode, dubbed “Real Dead Housewife of Seattle,” that I might just make a list

Here goes, in order of gasp-worthiness:

Vaughn Du Clark (a pitch-perfect Steven Weber) takes a page from “The Walking Dead” by keeping a live zombie locked in a basement stronghold at Max Rager headquarters. What?

And then he lures his business and romantic rival, Terrence Fowler, into the zombie’s lair and basically feeds him to the starving monster. What?!

There’s no Blaine in this episode, so the evil has to come from somewhere. Vaughn is happy to oblige, proving that he’ll kill humans just as easily as zombies.

Peyton Charles (Aly Michalka) returns after three months of radio silence – trying to absorb Liv’s zombie coming-out with exotic international travel or something – to head a new anti-Utopium task force for the local authorities.

Gilda, the Max Rager minion and two-faced liar worming her way into Liv’s life, is actually Vaughn Du Clark’s daughter. She will be known now and forever after as Gilda the Duplicitous.

Granted, the genetic cards were stacked against her. Still, she’s awful, whether she’s pretending to be Liv’s friend or seducing Major Lilywhite (!), which she does in this hour. Tramp!

On to the down and dirty of “Real Dead Housewife,” which sees Major (Robert Buckley) continue his Utopium abuse and resume his zombie murders, Clive contemplate pocket squares and Ravi crush a date.

The homicide victim this week is Taylor Fowler, a spoiled and selfish trophy wife tossed off her balcony by a hit man who accidentally falls with her during their struggle. Yes, that’s a spectacular view, marred by the two crumpled bodies on the rocks below.

There are at least a few easy-to-spot suspects like her well-heeled frenemies and her cheating husband, a Max Rager board member. She had been having her own affair with Vaughn Du Clark, of all people. What a tangled web.

But as it turns out, her husband’s extramarital activities bring about her literal downfall. He’s a devotee of a website called SugarDaddio.com, which automatically makes him guilty of stupidity and sets up Taylor as an obstacle to be removed

A gal who calls herself Bethany manipulates a guy named Joe into killing Taylor. Bethany, of SugarDaddio and many other old-dude-trolling sites, fancies herself the lady of the Fowlers’ gorgeous view home, but she doesn’t share that with Joe. He does the deed and survives the fall, but we don’t hear from him again. He’s either in jail or a coma.

There’s enough of a trail, though, that Det. Babineaux (Malcolm Goodwin) and Liv start to figure out what happened after searching through what Liv calls “a catalog of skanks.” These are young women like Bethany seeking rich older men for fun and profit.

Liv thinks for a moment that she’s found a new gal pal in Bethany, a stylist who invites her on an exclusive shopping spree. But Bethany catches wind of Clive’s suspicions and makes a run for it. She pepper sprays Liv, which triggers the first zombie rage we’ve seen from our heroine in some time. Suffice to say, Bethany stays put.

The levity in this episode comes mostly from Liv on Taylor’s brains. Eaten with a lovely tuna salad, that privileged noggin turns Liv into someone who demands attention and a chauffeur along with her mineral water. She dishes with Taylor’s catty friends and throws a drink at Vaughn when he disses the dead woman, aka his former bed buddy.

Short but significant aside: During this visit to Max Rager, Liv, Clive and Major inadvertently give Vaughn and Gilda some vital information. It’s tough for me to believe the bad guys didn’t already have this intel, but they seem out of the loop.

Vaughn doesn’t know about Liv and Major’s romantic history. Well, he does now, but wouldn’t all of his high-tech snooping have zeroed in on that long ago? And Gilda seems to hear for the first time that zombies get “psychic” visions from the brains they eat. This will not be good for our heroes.

Peyton pays a long overdue visit to Dr. Ravi Chakrabarti (Rahul Kohli), apologizing for bugging out without a word. Those two had only been dating for a few weeks at the time, as Ravi tells Liv, but they had great chemistry. I’m not willing to let this wither before it ever got a chance to bloom. Let the shipping begin!

Liv, coming down from her Prada high, buys herself a birthday bottle of booze and preps for a solo celebration. She finds a cake in the refrigerator at home and, through a rare bit of honesty from Gilda, realizes the treat is from Peyton. She has a friend after all.