Well, he felt like he was “in the pack of scraggly coyotes, hanging on by a thread.” And in this seventh week of “Dancing With the Stars” competition, Andy Dick was finally picked off from the pack. And while no one can say they were very surprised by the result (well, perhaps except Andy’s daughter, who shook her head in disbelief in the audience), it was still sad to see the comedian and his elegant pro partner Sharna Burgess go. Because he took this competition so seriously, and also because it seemed to be a huge part of his whole life recovery.
Monday night’s punishingly low scores didn’t help. (“I didn’t see it. I was in my trailer crying,” Andy half-joked to Sean and Peta after their Monday night rumba.) “Damn you for giving us that 5!” Andy half-seriously shook his fist at Carrie Ann. “It was all your fault!” Ultimately, though, Andy put on a teary but brave face. “The fact that we’re here in Week 7 is amazing,” he concluded. “It’s been the best thing.” Good luck and godspeed, Andy. May the spirit of Gene Kelly, the fringe from a ballroom skirt and the wind of a sparkly fan machine be ever at your back.
Not too surprisingly, Ingo Rademacher and Kym Johnson were also in the bottom two this week. The fact that popular non-quarterback Jacoby Jones and Karina Smirnoff were also deemed “in jeopardy” (causing Tom to quip, “And I think we’re in jeopardy with his mama”), however, came out of nowhere — kind of like Jacoby’s errant football throw to Kym’s head.
The pros really got to showcase their expert moves in this results hour. Witney Carson and the Guys kicked off the Latin Night results hour with a scorching hot routine. Later, Our Pros returned in some cotton candy wigs for a retro-modern burlesque number that was quirky sexy cool, choreographed by Sheryl Murakami and set to “Terrible Things” by April Smith and the Great Picture Show.
Grammy-winner and “DWTS” perennial Michael Bublé revisited the ballroom in his dapper tux and a song from his latest album, “To Be Loved.” Michael Bublé is so exceedingly “DWTS” appropriate that he should be on always. I mean, his song was called “Come Dance With Me,” for ballroom’s sake. He name-checked the cha cha and the tango. And he clapped for the dancers! (I’m an advocate of openly supportive dancer-musician relations.) I also approved the mix of church and state when the pro ladies draped themselves all over Mr. Bublé at the beginning of the routine. And then played red rover with him right before commercial.
The judges had a hankering for a fruit salad, asking to see Alexandra Raisman and Mark Ballas’ tropical cocktail of a salsa for the encore dance. And while the routine at first glance seemed like a fun frothy maraca-shaking number, the Derek Hough signature crotch dip along with Aly’s heaving chest pump along the dance floor made this more like an adult drink than a mocktail upon repeated viewing. She’s under 21, Mark!
The AT&T Spotlight Performance was truly an inspiration, focusing on Camden, N.J., native Tawanda Jones and her Camden Sophisticated Sisters drill team, which she established as a safe haven for the girls in the troubled town. “They are my kids,” Tawanda said. “I didn’t give birth to them, but they are mine.” And the girls really did their “mother” proud with a high-energy routine choreographed by Brooke Williams (to Beyoncé, of course) that was as fun and as sparkly as it was life-affirming. And because the glitterverse isn’t anything if it doesn’t share its reflections, Brooke and Tom (or “DWTS”?) pooled their resources to provide the Sisters mirrors for their water tower rehearsal space. Because what is the glitterverse if it doesn’t share its reflection? Confetti showers for all!
Emotions continued to run high as we learned the story of Adrianne Haslet, a pro ballroom dancer and instructor who lost her foot in the Boston Marathon terror attacks. Cheers to Adrianne for her fighting spirit and to her husband and family for supporting her every move toward recovery and prosthetics. “The more I’m forced to face it, the better I am,” she said. “I absolutely will dance again.” Adrianne was celebrated for her bravery, as was “DWTS” for highlighting her inspiring story and following her progress. It truly is, as Tom said, a testament of the power of the human spirit.
The Macy’s Stars of Dance performance featured “So You Think You Can Dance” favorites and real-life couple Allison Holker and Stephen “tWitch” Boss in an unconventional contempo-hip-hop casual routine that crossed audience and genre lines, traversing up in the audience and to the floor and back again, and accompanied by Internet violin sensation Lindsey Stirling.
Favorite quotes: “Who don’t love trophies?” wondered Jacoby when asked why he wanted to stay in the competition. Also, Tom’s “Welcome back to the home of spandex lingerie.”
What do you think, ballroom fans? Did the right star go home this week? Should Jacoby Jones even been in jeopardy?