‘Once Upon a Time’: Straying from ‘Selfless, Brave and True’

Pinocchio is back in this “Selfless, Brave and True” episode of “Once Upon a Time.” August the writer has been suffering a crisis of conscience that he could never seem to get his wooden heart around. In addition, Mendel’s cover is blown: Regina now knows who he is, and he doesn’t even realize the danger he’s in.

We start in Phuket, 2011. Apparently August made his way there, though we’re not exactly sure why. He realizes that something is causing him to become wooden again and goes to see a doctor. No one can see the magical malady of his wooden leg. Luckily, or not, someone helps him out and points him toward a man who they say will be able to help: the Dragon.

Back in Storybrooke, Charming wants to baby Mary Margaret. Emma is more of a tough-love type of gal, so they disagree. Mary Margaret decides that maybe she needs to take a trip in the woods to clear her head -- alone.

TIMELINE: Snow White through the years

Neal, breaking a cardinal rule that we’re going to make up right now, invited his fiancée, Tamara, to Storybrooke. Outside people are not allowed, Neal. As Emma said, his fiancée could see a giant, a fireball, a werewolf, or worse. But, if she won’t freak out, maybe Emma is also correct in advising him to tell her the whole truth. That’s always best, right?

Mary Margaret, getting out some aggression with her bow and arrow, rediscovers August/Pinocchio in a trailer in the woods! He has turned back into a completely wooden person, or as he calls himself, a “woodpile of failure.” Yeah, Pinocchio is pretty down.

The truth was tol, and Tamara didn’t take the “Storybooke/Enchanted Forest upbringing” explanation very well. Even after bagels. But, unbeknown to Neal, Tamara is all too familiar with magic.

Back in Phuket 2011, August goes to see the Dragon, and Tamara is there! It’s just a chance meeting as they cross paths. The Dragon needs payment to help Pinocchio stop the wooden encroachment. He takes the string that Geppetto first gave Pinocchio as he was becoming a real boy. And the real world cost? $10,000, please.

Mendel/Owen and Regina have a diner chat. The evil queen is beginning to remember something about Mendel but can’t quite put her finger on it yet. As she leaves the diner, she runs into Mary Margaret and utters one of the episode’s great lines: “If I were you, I’d try the fish special. Blackened sole.” Goodness, that was pretty awesome. Mary Margaret also tells Emma and Geppetto that August is back.

PHOTOS: Movie princesses through the years

The Blue Fairy says that August can only become real again if he takes a true path to redemption. His wooden state isn’t something that she can cure unless he is selfless, brave and true. Mary Margaret has to believe he can be redeemed. The darkness in her heart is freaking her out a bit.

Back in 2011, August meets up with Tamara again in Phuket, and promptly steals from her. They discussed how the Dragon required a personal item close to their heart to perform his magic, and how she used a picture of her and her grandmother. Switching gears, Tamara finds August back in Storybrooke! Wow. Who is this lady? She had to give the Dragon a picture of her grandmother ... hmmm.

Another great line came from the Dragon: “For someone who spent his entire life running, you should be in better shape.” August gives the Dragon the money and walks away with the cure. He never gets to use it, though, as Tamara returns, chases him down, and he stiffens up, so to speak. She takes the cure back and has apparently been cancer-free ever since. Back in the present, she is really adamant about getting August to leave Storybrooke and even tells him there’s a cure for him at her apartment in New York. He takes the bait and skips town. How can Pinocchio be such a coward!?!

Regina finally remembers who Owen is: the little boy from 28 years ago all grown up. She confronts him and tells him to leave town. He’s pretty stubborn, though, and wants to find his father, who was detained in Storybrooke all those years ago. “People can’t just disappear.” He doesn’t know the evil queen well.

In the past, Tamara returns and tases the Dragon as he is transforming into ... well, we’ll never know; she tased him to death. Back in the present, she tases a wooden August, who, after a change of wooden heart, returned to Storybrooke to warn the town about Tamara. Still can’t place her in fairy tale or literary lore, but she’s dangerous, even with just her nonmagical taser.

As he lay dying, August tries to warn Emma. The message doesn’t get through, but the fact that he was brave enough to try was enough for the Blue Fairy’s magic to work. August is back, as a real boy. Pinocchio has returned, but he has none of August’s memories. Tamara is safe -- for now.

Twist! Owen and Tamara meet up, and kiss passionately! She’s been a part of his plan the whole time, or vice versa. I’m going with vice-versa -- Tamara seems to be the brains in that operation.

Neither should place any apples on their heads, though. Seems Robin Hood will be making an appearance in the next new episode.

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