‘Two and a Half Men’ to kick off final season with gay-adoption storyline

Ashton Kutcher and Jon Cryer are going to a chapel, and they’re gonna get married. Or, rather, they’re “Two and a Half Men” characters will in its final season.

CBS boss Nina Tassler revealed Thursday at the Television Critics Assn. press tour that the swan-song season of “Two and a Half Men” will see Walden and Alan — played by Kutcher and Cryer, respectively — tie the knot and have a baby. Yes, really.

“Walden [Kutcher] is going to have a major health scare, and it is going to give him a little bit of an existential crisis,” Tassler said to reporters. “And he wants to find a way to add more meaning to his life, so he decides he wants to adopt a child.”

She continued: “In doing so, he starts the process and realizes it’s very difficult to adopt a child as a single, straight man. So once and for all he decides: ‘I’m going to propose to Alan [Cryer], and we’re going to get married and adopt a child as a gay couple.’ That’s just going to start the season on ‘Two and a Half Men,’ and I think we’re off for a great run.”

Tassler said she doesn’t expect the faux gay adoption plot will stir any negative reaction from the LGBTQ community.

“I think it’s a very positive statement,” she told reporters. “It’s like ‘You know what, I’m going to adopt a child as a gay couple,’ and it’s like the reality is he can do that, and in a universe when at one point you couldn’t do that and now you can do that.”

“Two and a Half Men” creator Chuck Lorre, Tassler said, has other tricks up his sleeve for the final season. But recruiting an appearance from Charlie Sheen before it heads into retirement doesn’t seem to be one of them.

“We are not having those conversations right now,” she said.

“Two and a Half Men” will begin its 12th and final season Oct. 30.

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