The scene is set.
You've been dating for several months. You like her; she likes you. You enjoy spending time together and there's a certain "spark" between you. Now, as the holidays approach and family gatherings loom, you both come to a decision about your relationship: It's time to (cue the drum roll please) meet the parents.
Unless you met as castaways on a deserted island, it's inevitable that you will one day have to meet face-to-face with your girlfriend's parents. And while the rules have changed in recent years as social media-savvy parents can now befriend you on Facebook and monitor your coming and goings on Twitter, it still is important to make a good first impression when you finally meet.
What to Do
First impressions only cut the surface of the issue. Parents don't want their daughters to be scrounging at the bottom end of the boyfriend food chain. Parents are funny that way.
Here some key points to keep in mind before that first meeting, or should we say, interview, with her parents. Just look at it as a job interview and you'll be just fine!
1. Do Your Homework. Quiz your girlfriend about her parents: What do they do for a living? What are their politics, hobbies and interests? If this sounds like you're cramming for an exam, you're right. It's called Essential Parenting Knowledge 101.
2. Be Prepared. It's important to anticipate that they might ask you tough questions, so have a game plan as to how to answer. Topics might include career, current affairs, commitment to their daughter, prison time, your view on kids, animals, etc. You get the picture.
3. Dress to Impress. This includes getting a haircut, shaving, clipping your nails, using deodorant! Unless your girlfriend's parents are in a touring rock band, it's probably best to dress conservatively: an ironed collared shirt, slacks, matching socks, matching shoes.
4. Be on Time and Bring a Gift. Arriving an hour late for your first meeting with the parents is not a good way to make a good impression. The gift should be appropriate. A bottle of wine is nice during the holidays: a fifth of Old Granddad Whiskey probably not so much.
5. Shake Hands, Smile and Look Her Relatives in the Eye. When you finally stand in front of the parental units, be sure to smile, speak calmly and clearly, and no wimpy, loose-noodle handshakes. Firm is best, and it shows you're confident even if you aren't. And look them in the eye when conversing. Looking away or down gives the impression that you're shady, shy or uninterested three strikes and "yer out"!
6. Keep Your Conversation Simple. Don't try to over-impress them by regurgitating facts and figures concerning the world economy. Instead, be a good listener and be sure to include your girlfriend in your conversation.
7. Saying Goodbye. Hopefully everything has gone well and you've wowed them with your potential as their daughter's go-to guy. As you leave, smile and again shake hands. Tell them what a great time you had, and you can't wait "to do this again." As the door closes, resist the urge to pump your fist and yell "booyah!" Wait until you get into the car and are at least a few miles away to do that.
You've been dating for several months. You like her; she likes you. You enjoy spending time together and there's a certain "spark" between you. Now, as the holidays approach and family gatherings loom, you both come to a decision about your relationship: It's time to (cue the drum roll please) meet the parents.
What to Do
First impressions only cut the surface of the issue. Parents don't want their daughters to be scrounging at the bottom end of the boyfriend food chain. Parents are funny that way.
Here some key points to keep in mind before that first meeting, or should we say, interview, with her parents. Just look at it as a job interview and you'll be just fine!
1. Do Your Homework. Quiz your girlfriend about her parents: What do they do for a living? What are their politics, hobbies and interests? If this sounds like you're cramming for an exam, you're right. It's called Essential Parenting Knowledge 101.
2. Be Prepared. It's important to anticipate that they might ask you tough questions, so have a game plan as to how to answer. Topics might include career, current affairs, commitment to their daughter, prison time, your view on kids, animals, etc. You get the picture.
3. Dress to Impress. This includes getting a haircut, shaving, clipping your nails, using deodorant! Unless your girlfriend's parents are in a touring rock band, it's probably best to dress conservatively: an ironed collared shirt, slacks, matching socks, matching shoes.
4. Be on Time and Bring a Gift. Arriving an hour late for your first meeting with the parents is not a good way to make a good impression. The gift should be appropriate. A bottle of wine is nice during the holidays: a fifth of Old Granddad Whiskey probably not so much.
5. Shake Hands, Smile and Look Her Relatives in the Eye. When you finally stand in front of the parental units, be sure to smile, speak calmly and clearly, and no wimpy, loose-noodle handshakes. Firm is best, and it shows you're confident even if you aren't. And look them in the eye when conversing. Looking away or down gives the impression that you're shady, shy or uninterested three strikes and "yer out"!
6. Keep Your Conversation Simple. Don't try to over-impress them by regurgitating facts and figures concerning the world economy. Instead, be a good listener and be sure to include your girlfriend in your conversation.
7. Saying Goodbye. Hopefully everything has gone well and you've wowed them with your potential as their daughter's go-to guy. As you leave, smile and again shake hands. Tell them what a great time you had, and you can't wait "to do this again." As the door closes, resist the urge to pump your fist and yell "booyah!" Wait until you get into the car and are at least a few miles away to do that.
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