From Now On, They’re Nothing Special

Over.

The Lakers you knew and loved, who won three titles and drove you crazy, are no more.

If they were special from the summer of 1996 when they acquired Kobe Bryant, who became half of the greatest 1-2 punch in NBA history, it ended Saturday when they agreed to the deal that will give away the other half, Shaquille O’Neal.

Now the Lakers are like lots of teams. They have some talent but would kill for size. Their projected starting lineup has one player over 6 foot 9, and that’s Lamar Odom, a small forward when he played in the West.

Right. Next season’s Lakers will look a lot like last season’s Miami Heat. Unfortunately, unlike the Heat, the Lakers won’t get to play in the East.

The package the Lakers are getting -- Odom, Brian Grant, Caron Butler and a draft pick -- for the player who, even in decline, remains the game’s mightiest force, is laughable. They’re doing it because they think Bryant needs O’Neal gone now and isn’t particular about what they get back, but even that is uncertain.

No one is sure what Bryant and his agent, Rob Pelinka, tell the Lakers, or whether the Lakers dare to press them, but they don’t always communicate. If everyone assumed Bryant signed off before they hired Rudy Tomjanovich, insiders said Kobe was signaling something entirely different.

If Bryant returns, the Lakers still will be a playoff team, but a longshot to get past the second round.

Can you season-ticket holders spell p-r-i-c-e r-o-l-l-b-a-c-k?

Of course, if Bryant doesn’t return, the question becomes, can you spell C-l-i-p-p-e-r-s?

It has been a long time since the Lakers weren’t sure of who they were or where they were headed, since the dark days of the early ‘90s after Magic Johnson retired.

However, from their Finals appearance in 1991, it took only five seasons of Nick Van Exel’s bumping referees, Cedric Ceballos’ going sailing, et al., to become good enough and accumulate enough salary cap room to land O’Neal and Bryant.

After that, they were the team everyone feared, even if the fledging colossus fell on its face in the springs of 1997, 1998 and 1999.

Now, who knows?

With O’Neal gone, Karl Malone’s return is a longshot. Malone was hoping against hope he could keep O’Neal and Bryant together so he could rejoin them for one more run.

Bryant, who looks up to Malone, would love to keep Karl with him, but at 40, it’s late in Mailman’s career to be casting his lot with undersized longshots.

Oh, by the way, among the teams calling Malone these days is San Antonio.

The Lakers will be pygmies among the West giants and hard-pressed to get bigger. They can re-sign Slava Medvedenko, but you might remember what their interior defense was like in the Finals when Malone went out and Slava went in.

If Bryant stays, they’ll be capped out through the summer of 2007, when Grant’s contract, which will be up to $15.4 million, runs out.

Yao Ming, Amare Stoudemire and Jamaal Magloire can be on the market in 2007, but with Bryant at about $20 million and Odom at $10.9 million, getting far enough under the cap would require a lot of sacrifices between now and then.

No one could get a deal that goes beyond 2007. If Medvedenko wants four years, the Lakers have to choose between bringing Slava back now, or cap space in 2007.

If Butler gets an offer sheet in 2006 as a restricted free agent, the Lakers have to choose between keeping him and going shopping in 2007.

The bottom line is they can’t rebuild and contend at the same time without re-creating the miracle of the loaves and fishes. The Lakers will say they’re contenders, but it will be some trick to crash the elite in this conference with this roster.

Of course, if Bryant returns, it’s because he expects the Lakers to win titles, and I don’t think he means three years down the line.

There’s a term for the Lakers now: contradiction in terms.

I hope you enjoyed them while they were here because you’re not likely to see anything like them again anywhere.

Here’s another confident prediction: There’s no one, not Bryant or O’Neal or anyone else who was around them, playing for them, working for them, cheering for them or covering them, who won’t miss them.

O’Neal will have a monster season in Miami, on a mission to prove he’s really not old, fat and done. In the little East, he’ll be like the T-Rex in “Jurassic Park,” romping through the meadow after the fleeing herds of little dinosaurs.

Of course, after that, we’ll see won’t we?

Likewise, if Bryant is back, he’ll keep taking his already-brilliant game to new levels, and he’ll be obliged to lead the Lakers, but I still don’t think he can get them past the Spurs, Timberwolves, Rockets and Kings.

Bryant might have a better chance with the Clippers, but then there’s the Donald T. Sterling factor to consider.

In any case, it won’t be the same. There never was anyone like the Lakers of the last eight seasons, and soon they’ll be gone too.