For the love of God, ditch the adult baby, hobo and pimp costumes! This year, show off your pop culture smarts with these getups fashioned after fabulously ridiculous celebs.
Nick and Jessica
We found all we needed to emulate America's favorite airhead at Beatnix (Nick's casual look is probably already in your closet). "Jessica Simpson" wig ($26), pop star-worthy tight, flared nylon pants ($18) and plenty of skimpy halters. Don't have the, er, assets to pull this one off? Pick up a pair of plastic ones ($30). Grab a black mullet wig ($20) and have a third pal go as Ashlee, the "hair-don't" Simpson sib.
Accessory: For Jessica, Chicken of the Sea tuna; for Nick, a seemingly endless supply of patience.
They have her number, and now so can you. Dress as federal inmate No. 55170-054 with an orange prison jumpsuit ($22.99) and a blonde bob wig ($8 and up) from Card & Party Giant.
Accessory: Don't forget the pearls.
Pick up the "Paris Hilton" wig from Beatnix ($26). For skimpy duds in Paris's preferred pink, check out Forever 21, where we found a super-short pleated pink skirt ($14.80 ), a rhinestone-trimmed hot pink tank ($8.80), and, for bling that won't break the bank, earrings (from $1.80). 34 S. State St. 312-977-2121.
Accessory: A Hilton-worthy tiara from Ido Collection (from $25), or a tiara hair comb (from $8). 2558 N. Clark St. 773-935-0364.
Michigan Avenue Yanni (a.k.a. The Walking Dude)
If you live or work in the Loop, you've probably seen this Greek god lookalike wandering the Mag Mile in a suit and yellowing undershirt. In an homage to his style, we found suits at Ragstock ($15), and for the 'do most guys would die for, try the brown '60s wig ($21.25) and mustache ($9.99) at Chicago Costume Co.
Accessory: An air of mystery and a good pair of walking shoes.
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen
Make up NYU T-shirts at Strange Cargo to celebrate the twins' new role as college freshmen. Since Halloween is finally time for the un-PC in our midst to rise and walk among the living, dress Mary-Kate as a skeleton in an ode to her stint at an eating disorder clinic earlier this year. We found plenty of Olsen-worthy wigs among the more than 1,000 on display at Fantasy Costume Hdq., as well as a glow-in-the dark skeleton costume ($44).
Accessory: There's nothing more frightening than the twins' former co-star Dave Coulier.
The White Stripes
We found costumes for the red-and-white-clad rock duo at Beatnix. For Meg: a white fringed tank top ($24), red nylon pants (from $14), and a brown wig with bangs ($24). For Jack: a wide variety of red pants (from $12), white western shirt ($24) and a dark brown wig ($20)--use makeup to give the fist-fighting member of the duo a few cuts and bruises.
Accessory: A bag of Meg's favorite peppermint candies (that's where the band's name comes from), anger management self-help book for Jack.
Britney Spears and Kevin Federline
To go as the newlyweds, skip the formal wedding attire and don velour tracksuits like the ones the happy couple and their guests wore following the ceremony: a pink number with "Mrs. Federline" on the back for Britney, a white suit with "Hers" on the back for the newest Mr. Spears. Gather a group of your pals to go as the wedding party in matching "Pimps" and "Maids" tracksuits. Bring in your own suits and Strange Cargo will do the iron-on decals starting at 50 cents per letter.
Accessory: Cheeseburgers and chicken strips.
We found "open bust" teddies (from $32.95) and a black wig ($32.95) perfect for portraying the pop diva on the day of her infamous wardrobe malfunction at Taboo Tabou. The modest can find "foam breasts" at Beatnix ($10).
Accessory: In lieu of a nipple shield, we found a brooch for $3 at Ido Collection (2558 N. Clark St. 773-935-0364) that will both work for this costume (provided you go the foam breast route) and offer a much-needed update to your fall wardrobe.
"The Passion" has put Jesus in fashion. Get his robe ($29.99) and a biblical wig and beard set ($34.99) at Fantasy Costumes Hdq.
Accessory: Eternal damnation resulting from all the sacrilegious things you'll do in this getup after too many glasses of punch.
Sandra Langeneckert is a metromix special contributor.Originally published Oct. 4, 2004.Copyright © 2014, Los Angeles Times