Outside a Chinese gate, a Shaq

Beijing

For wisdom and solace during these bustling Olympics, some folks visit the temple of Confucius.

Others seek refuge in the Palace of Heavenly Purity.

Still others find respite at the Hall of Supreme Harmony.

Me, I went to see Shaq.

He's tucked away outside a remote gate of a city park, no markers on a tourist map, no signs on the street.

He's surrounded not by incense, but public toilets.

He's staring not into the future, but at a parking lot.

Those who visit offer him gifts not of gold and myrrh, but projectile spit and empty water bottles.

But former Lakers center Shaquille O'Neal doesn't seem to mind.

Here, nobody can accuse him of not hustling, because he literally is nailed to the ground.

Here, nobody can exhort him to work on his wooden hands because, well, the dude actually has wooden hands.

And here, finally, nobody can ever dare say that Kobe Bryant is bigger.

Here, the self-proclaimed Superman really is a super man.

All 50 feet of him.

Welcome to the Forbidden Center, the Great Brick Wall of China, the Temple of the Clang Dynasty.

Welcome to hell on earth for the Lakers, but heaven every day for Shaq.

Here he can stand forever in his uniform, holding a ball, surrounded by fans, without ever having to shoot a free throw.

Yeah, I still don't quite believe it either, but in the heart of Beijing is a giant statue of Shaquille O'Neal.

It sits outside the east gate of Chaoyang Park, Shaq looking over the basketball courts and soccer fields that sprawl across a massive playground.