Examining the Dodgers' resolutions for the new year

Dodgers catcher A.J. Ellis, a blogger's best friend, is surrounded by teammates after hitting a home run. (Robert Gauthier / Los Angeles Times / October 2, 2012)

By Steve Dilbeck

January 1, 2013, 5:20 a.m.

I’d like to start this by resolving that this will be my last cheap resolutions post. At least until I’m desperate for material to start the next year.

Otherwise, here are some 2013 new year's resolutions for the Boys in Blue:

Juan Uribe: Eat three meals a day. To eat only three meals a day.

Andre Ethier: To remember how I hit .279 against left-handers in 2007.

Magic Johnson: Not to be found sitting next to Frank McCourt at next season’s opener.

Luis Cruz: To remember walks really are allowed. Anyway, that’s what A.J. Ellis keeps telling me.

Javy Guerra: Remind the Dodgers how I saved 21 of 23 games in 2011.

Tommy Lasorda: Discover one more L.A. Italian restaurant. Where I can get comped.

Josh Beckett: To mix in a smile.

Sam Fernandez: After 30 years as team lawyer, to finally write “How I Survived.”

Ronald Belisario: Wait, what, it’s already new year's? Even in Venezuela?

Hanley Ramirez: Admit I’m no longer really a shortstop.

Don Mattingly: To bunt less. Ha-ha, just kidding.

Eric Collins: Attend a home game.

Chris Capuano: Still be a Dodger.

Zack Greinke: To love the media.

Ned Colletti: Never be seen again wearing my Giants NLCS ring.

Mark Ellis: Not to have any disgusting surgeries I’d never heard of before.

Blake Hawksworth: Remind the Dodgers I’m still alive.

Stan Kasten: To stop being confused with Peter Boyle. The guy’s been dead for five years.

Comments (32)

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stnlong71 at 2:26 AM January 04, 2013

AJ Ellis, also ignore the Dodger postgamers that give the answers and then ask the questions. Example: "you hit two homeruns and had a single, how did you do today?

Sean-123 at 1:17 PM January 03, 2013

Just to prove how much of a bandwagon he is.. he claims 'dynstay' how can you claim dynasty when about 90% of the 2010 and 2012 team are different? Proves how much he does not know about his beloved Giants. The only position player that is the same from 2010 and 2012 is Posey (Sandoval was benched for Uribe because he was fat) and the only pitchers who are the same were Bumgarner and Cain. Lincecum wasn't a starter this year and Zito was off the playoff roster in 2010.

Sean-123 at 1:15 PM January 03, 2013

Ignore 1900, he obviously has nothing better to do. You can tell by his extremely long and what he thinks is 'clever' posts. Funny though how he is still on here usually bandwagons dissapear after a certain amount of time. But he is still living off the high of October 2012. He will dissapear soon though, especially when Scutaro and Pagan go back to their mediocre ways and the Giants will be stuck with their bloated contracts. Lincecum's frame wont be able to pitch 200+ innings anymore. Vogelsong will become the journeyman we all know. Sandoval will turn into a bloated Panda and Crawford and Belt never progress. When the Giants are mediocre again he will dissapear just like any regular bandwagon.

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