Fan of the house: Here, there and everywhere

Random thoughts from the world of sports, and other stuff

Random thoughts while waiting for Meryl Streep and Jennifer Lopez to get the pay raises they richly deserve:

If Matthew McConaughey gets any weirder, he could run the Lakers.

The NHL needs a permanent outdoor venue, and California seems the best potential site. Suggestions: Carson, Hollywood Park, downtown L.A., the City of Industry . . . or high in Griffith Park, overlooking everything.

The San Antonio Spurs are one old guy away from becoming a Civil War reenactment. But they still have better knees than the Bulls' Derrick Rose, now headed for the Meniscus Hall of Fame.

No sport represents sunshine, warmth and hope the way March baseball does.

Favorite spring training joint: Don & Charlie's in Scottsdale, where I once had a martini so big there was a carp living on the bottom.

Prius drivers are the worst drivers.

This Dodgers TV standoff represents the biggest abandonment of a loyal fan base since Wayne Rogers left "MASH." Blood thuds in my ears when I hear the various sides blame each other. Just fix it.

Flat-seam baseballs are supposed to boost college hitting, which has been in the dumps since bat standards changed in 2011. Check out the results when USC and UCLA square off at Dodger Stadium on March 8, a Sunday. Student and children's tickets start at $5.

I mean, McConaughey and Jim Buss do look a little alike, right?

My Oscar for best sports movie of all time goes to … (see below)

Given the Dodgers' TV blackout, seems odd that the team does not appear once on ESPN's Sunday night slate through late July. Meanwhile, the Yankees are on three times; the Angels twice.

Jameis Winston will be the biggest bust since Kelsey Grammer's last sitcom.

The best solution to Dodger Stadium traffic? Greenlight all intersections to outgoing traffic for an hour after games.

FYI, Dodgertown in Vero Beach, Fla., was the first spring training facility to integrate players. For historian Jerald Podair's take, go to historicdodgertown.com.

Two most overrated sports movies of all time: "Hoosiers" and "Chariots of Fire."

Craziest accusation of the week: That Cal Ripken Jr. beat up a teammate during rookie hazings 20 years ago. "The Iron Man" denies it all.

The Clippers really miss Darren Collison. So will his new team, the Kings, if that bum hip doesn't heal.

Condolences to the family of Paul Napier, who died last weekend at age 84. The actor, who played the original Mr. Goodwrench, coached almost 80 combined seasons of youth baseball, basketball and football across more than 45 years. Ex-players include Charles White.

Favorite new couple: Hanley Ramirez and the Green Monster.

Happy birthday to Marshall Faulk, 42; Steve Blake, 35; and of course, the great Victor Hugo, who would be turning 213, if only he'd taken a little better care of himself.

Remember when the Oscars were held on Mondays and occasionally overlapped with NCAA finals? Name the year and the outcome when North Carolina faced off against Georgetown. (answer below).

OK, the Oscar for best sports picture goes to ... "Rocky."

The other nominees: "Field of Dreams," "Bull Durham," "Caddyshack," "Breaking Away," "Brian's Song" and "White Men Can't Jump."

Last weekend, white men actually did jump, on 700 tons of snow at the Rose Bowl. And fans jumped all over the beer tents, which were far too few.

Kevin Costner's high school hoops coach, Gary Snyder, reports that the Oscar winner was pretty raw on offense but "a ball of energy on defense." As a senior at Villa Park High, Costner worked his way up to become a valuable sixth man, Snyder says.

Can't wait to watch this kid Julio Urias throwing darts for the Dodgers.

Or to watch the Angels' Mike Trout do almost anything.

Congrats to Roger Angell, on his selection to the American Academy of Arts and Letters. At 94, the kid really shows some promise.

Trivia answer: The year, 1982, and the Michael Jordan-led Tar Heels beat Georgetown by a point. Best picture that night: "Chariots of Fire."

Keep decadence alive: Visit Santa Anita at least once during this long spring meet. As Bertrand Russell once said, "The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time."

Man, could that dude play defense.

chris.erskine@latimes.com

Twitter: @erskinetimes

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