A predictable win for Lakers, as Nuggets can't get upset

A review of Lakers playoff game No. 1 -- 15 wins to go.

PREGAME: The Dodgers still haven't recovered from opening the season with a saxophonist playing the national anthem. The Lakers know better, bringing out the booming voice of Agostino Castagnola to get everyone revved up.

Then the lights go out, the overhead sheets fall, and everyone's told, "Destiny is calling," followed by highlights of Kobe, and Kobe and then Kobe. There's also a glimpse of Andrew Bynum, and is this some kind of message they're trying to tell us, or maybe the Celtics?

"These are the playoffs," the sheets now read, like anyone in the building doesn't know. After all, Smush Parker no longer plays for the Lakers.

Whatever they're paying Lakers announcer LawrenceTanter, it isn't enough, Tanter adding just the right punctuation. "Now on your feet to greet the whole team," Tanter croons, and so everyone does -- before he introduces Rick Fox.

Fox, wearing his 2002 NBA winning Lakers jacket, delivers the game ball to referee Ken Mauer, the two posing at center court for photographers -- Mauer's arm around Fox's back. How do you like the Nuggets' chances now?

FIRST QUARTER: Nuggets win the jump, and probably should've called it a day. Kenyon Martin is covering Bryant, while Allen Iverson is assigned Vladimir Radmanovic. Now there are days when no one has to cover Radmanovic and he still won't score, but it doesn't bode well inside for the Nuggets.

Radmanovic gets into early foul trouble, and Luke Waltonplays well. How do you like the Nuggets' chances now?

Pau Gasol dunks, the Lakers go ahead by 10 and up on the scoreboard in Batman script, it reads, "Pau!" It works, but so would've, "Bless you, Memphis, bless you!"

Carmelo Anthony goes to the free-throw line for Denver, and the crowd starts chanting, "DUI." Who knew that Anthony and Jerry Buss would have something in common?

Later Anthony will say, "I wasn't expecting anything different. I'm on the road. That's what [fans] are supposed to do. They are supposed to try and distract me out there.

"But I've got to take my hat off to myself for not getting frustrated. . . . "

What a ridiculous thing to say. I can understand Anthony saying, "I've got to take my headband off to myself," but his hat?

The Nuggets will fly back to Denver after the game rather than remain in L.A. until Wednesday night's game, because they obviously can't trust their athletes to behave here. It's good news, of course, no one having to keep an eye out for Anthony on our freeways.

The Nuggets make only half of their free throws early on, they shoot a lot, but can't score, and the argument all week has been, what's the most attractive Sunday game for TV? The Spurs-Suns or the Lakers-Nuggets? The answer is obvious now.

SECOND QUARTER: The Lakers begin with a four-point lead but fall behind by as many as eight when Linas Kleiza makes like Larry Bird and drops in a pair of threes. Before the game, most people mention Linas' name, and they're thinking Peanuts, which might explain why the Lakers left him so open.

Andruw Jones is 0 for 3 with three strikeouts in Atlanta for the Dodgers so far, and is almost having the same kind of game as Bryant, who is one for nine.

Bryant also picks up a third foul, and what more do the Nuggets need to stage an upset? How about some discipline, focus at the free-throw line and someone throwing a hand up in Gasol's face?

Gasol puts the Lakers ahead again by two, then four, and later when someone asks Denver Coach George Karl about Gasol's domination, he says, "The film will show the Lakers tore us up.

"Coby Karl could have scored those baskets," he says, while referring to his son. Maybe with a step stool.