It’s Plan ‘B’ as in Blunder for Lakers

“Everybody has a plan ... until they get punched in the mouth.”

We bring up the words of Mike Tyson because not only have the Lakers surpassed him as the biggest sideshow in sports, it’s evident now that they didn’t even bring a plan with them into the ring.

And yes, that would be a circus ring, not a boxing ring.

If you’re going to cut loose the most successful pro coach of his time, you’d better have a suitable replacement chosen and ready.

If you’re going to put the best center of his time on the trading block, you’d better have a destination in mind.

And if you’re going to let a player dictate the future of the franchise, you’d better have a firm commitment that he’ll be a part of it.

As of Monday, after Mike Krzyzewski turned them down, the Lakers didn’t have solutions for all three of those huge question marks.

Still nobody to occupy Phil Jackson’s office, and no one out there who could line the window with as many replica Larry O’Brien trophies from his personal collection.

Still no deal in place for Shaquille O’Neal, who remains adamant in his desire to leave town.

Meanwhile, Kobe Bryant plans to spend some time this week in Clipper Country, apparently to see how the other half of the NBA lives.

The Lakers have never looked so ill-prepared at such an important juncture. Here they are, in a hole of their own digging, with no rope.

As Princess Leia said to Han Solo in the first “Star Wars” movie: “This is some rescue. When you came in here, didn’t you have a plan for getting out?”

The Lakers saw all of this coming. Much of it they created themselves. It was pretty clear from February on that Jackson would be gone, win or lose. There were some backstage indications during the playoffs that they had decided to trade O’Neal. And they had known for at least a year that Bryant intended to exercise the out clause in his contract this summer.

And still they had no contingency plan in place.

When this summer hit the Lakers -- and hit them hard in the form of an NBA Finals beat-down by the Detroit Pistons -- the best the Lakers could do was point to Bryant and say, “Um, what he says.”

But is it wise to place so much trust in the hands of someone who has guaranteed them so little in return, on a guy who is so difficult to read?

The inability to land Krzyzewski left Laker General Manager Mitch Kupchak “no more certain and no more uncertain” of Bryant’s intentions.

“Like many of our fans in Los Angeles, I expect several sleepless nights until he actually makes his decision,” Kupchak said.

Wow, that should spike the sales of Tylenol PM in the area.

Meanwhile, who knows what’s going through Bryant’s head?

Could Bryant be going through a midlife crisis at age 25? If this whole infatuation with Krzyzewski was some sort of desire to start again and reenact the college experience he never had, wouldn’t it make sense for him to join the Clippers and play with Elton Brand and Corey Maggette, who could have been his Blue Devil teammates in 1999 if he had gone to Duke for three years?

Bryant hasn’t given the definitive word on what he’ll do. Ultimately the final say isn’t even his. It’s up to the legal system in Eagle County, Colo.

Obviously the Lakers and other NBA suitors are betting that Bryant will be found not guilty of the sexual assault charge brought against him a year ago after an encounter with a hotel worker. Bryant says they had consensual sex. But anyone attempting to handicap this doesn’t even know what horses are in the gate. Judge Terry Ruckriegle has yet to rule on whether several potentially critical elements will be allowed in court after the trial begins Aug. 27, including the alleged victim’s sexual history and Bryant’s initial statements to the police.

Any questioning of Bryant’s ability to handle the major decisions for the franchise assumes that Kupchak is better suited for the job.

We’ve already learned of one qualification Kupchak lacks: the ability to lie. Or, at least, be less than truthful. It’s an admirable quality in a man, but potentially fatal for a league executive.

The whole Shaq situation exploded after Kupchak indicated that the team would be willing to part with O’Neal just moments after he insisted they would not trade Bryant.

Kupchak could have said something like, “We have no intentions of trading Shaquille at this time.” Since they didn’t have a suitable deal in place that moment, it would have been technically true.

Instead, O’Neal heard the comments, went public with his demands, and then Kupchak was playing catch-up instead of dealing from a position of strength. There might be only one or two feasible trades out there that make sense, but good luck finding them now.

Other team executives have told me they’ve been frustrated by how noncommittal and nonspecific Kupchak has been when they have made trade inquiries. Part of that has to be some hesitation to pull the trigger. It’s as if they hadn’t thought this through.

It’s unfair that Jerry Buss is off in Italy while Kupchak is left to take all the hits for merely following Buss’ orders.

I wonder whether Kupchak was even subconsciously trying to remind us of that when he said, “I still believe that this organization, owned by Dr. Buss and run by Dr. Buss, is the best professional basketball organization in the world.”

There was a time when that statement couldn’t be challenged. But now, like everything else about the Lakers, it’s a fair target.

J.A. Adande can be reached at j.a.adande@latimes.com. To read previous columns by Adande, go to latimes.com/adande.