Reading all these year-in-review recaps has left me a little groggy, so forgive me if my own look at 2012's top stories veers in and out of reality.
January Eyebrows raised when developers announce new hockey arena will be called The Heather Browne Center.
• Republican leaders reject complaints that the wacky primary election campaign demonstrates the party is moving so far right that it's out of touch.
February The late Strom Thurmond wins Iowa caucuses.
• Nazareth Borough Council puts foot down at discovery the police department has installed stadium seating in front of its TV.
• Defense of gerrymandered state legislative district maps takes a hit when court rules that an Erie elementary school class has submitted a more logical plan.
• Northampton County Judge Michael Koury alarms courthouse observers by jailing an entire jury for finding a defendant not guilty.
• Allentown Mayor Ed Pawlowski brings all his diplomatic skills to bear to reassure suburban communities about the impact of Allentown's plan to use their earned income taxes in city's Neighborhood Improvement Zone.
March Suburban communities file suit.
• Archaeologists discover ancient Mayan calendar that predicts Lehigh will defeat Duke.
April Gov. Tom Corbett proposes budget that once again cuts into human services funding, including services for people suffering from mental illness.
• On the bright side, the outlook is excellent for charter schools and frackers.
May Lehigh University professor Stephen Thode announces that according to his reasoned analysis, Allentown's Neighborhood Improvement Zone will cause the Earth to tilt off its axis and explode.
• Easton police kill a black bear, mistaking it for a Siberian tiger.
• Gov. Tom Corbett, under fire for proposing more huge cuts in state college funding, suggests they "close their eyes."
June Macungie Mayor Rick Hoffman announces he won't seek another term, instead devoting himself full-time to his law enforcement career.
July Allentown School District hires King of Ga as director of communications.
September State Education Secretary Ron Tomalis explains that drops in PSSA scores have absolutely nothing to do with the shrunken teacher and tutoring staffs and programs resulting from Corbett's cuts in public school funding. Rather, he says, they're exclusively the result of thwarting cheaters.
• Tomalis also explains that replacement referees have had nothing to do with the NFL's screwed up early season.