Sometimes the hardest part of a cop's job has to be keeping a straight face...
A 30-year-old man told Fort Pierce police last Saturday that he lent his rented Dodge Avenger to his 24-year-old friend, reports Will Greenlee in his Off the Beat blog for TCpalm.com.
That friend, a Vero Beach resident, said he drove the Avenger to Fort Pierce to meet a "female acquaintance" -- but she was a no-show.
So the friend drove to a park where he saw women "'hanging out'" and met a young woman with "real big thighs."
The man said they "talked for about an hour before he 'talked her out of her pants," and they drove to a "lodging establishment" that rents rooms for $30 an hour.
After geting drunk, the man dozed off.
When he woke up, "Big thighs" was gone, as well as his gold bracelet, watch, cash and the Avenger.
Also missing -- the man's silver trousers.
Guess his silver trousers matched his silver tongue.
Get the DUHtails at Will Greenlee's Off the Beat blog for TCPalm.com.