That's how I feel about last week's spin-off episode of "Grey's Anatomy."
Here I was all "Addison is the perfect character for a spin-off" and "look, they cast my new secret boyfriend Paul Adelstein" and "oh, this could be really good." And what we're left with? An episode that was so bad that I actually think the show might not get picked for next season.
Besides having a commercial every five seconds, where did it go wrong?
It was boring: The episode created the greatest offense of any series: it simply can't be dull. I don't know if it was because they were trying to introduce too many characters at once (oh look a womanizer here, a serial monogamist there) or if because we are so used to the bizarre medical story lines on "ER," "Nip/Tuck" and "Grey's Anatomy" that nothing can shock us (so the surrogate mother slept with three men, so what?) But I'm here to tell you it simply didn't work. No wonder the show's working title is "Private Practice." A show this boring deserves a boring title.
I didn't connect with any of the characters: How can I love so many of the actors and not like any of the characters they've been saddled with playing. To see Chris Lowell, who is so compelling and delightful as Piz on "Veronica Mars," reduced to shirtless eye candy? The fabulous Amy Brenneman in such a cliched situation (Looking awful and running into my ex-boyfriend at the supermarket). It pains me to say this, but I didn't feel the need to see any of them every again.
Not one moment was believable: That scene between Addison (or Addie as her California friends call her) and Tim Daly in the stairwell was simply preposterous. I don't ask for utter realism but -- come on -- who says something like "I'm going to kiss you. I'm going to kiss you with tongue. I'm going to kiss you so you feel it." I was actually embarrassed for both of them.
They killed off Meredith's step-mom: Okay, that really has nothing to do with the spin-off, but I'm peeved. First of all, how much does Meredith have to suffer? Is she going to become the Andy Sipowicz of Seattle Grace? Let's hope not because she doesn't have the gravitas to pull it off. Secondly, there were so many interesting directions to go with Meredith exploring this new relationship with a loving mother figure. And, finally, I love Mare Winningham -- have since "St. Elmo's Fire" (and by the way if you've never seen that movie, consider it a required assignment) -- and I liked seeing more of her on TV.
I think they have to scrap the whole idea and start all over again. But what did you think of the "Grey's Anatomy" spin-off? Write me at email@example.com and let me know.
Quotes of the Week
"You guys were like a bad Meg Ryan movie in there." Eric to Vince about how Vince and his agent Amanda were behaving on "Entourage."
"You're cursed Jack. Everything you touch one way or another ends up dead." Secretary of Defense James Heller to Jack on "24." James, we've been saying the exact same thing for years.
Where Have I Seen Them Before?
Jack McGee, Chief Jerry Reilly on "Rescue Me," was the bar owner trying to pay off the police department on "Veronica Mars."
Did you recognize David Anders, the dastardly Sark on "Alias," as the husband of the pregnant woman on "Grey's Anatomy"? We were all excited about the mini- "Alias" reunion between Anders and Merrin Dungey, but Joe was the first to wonder why Anders had so few lines. Stephanie Niznik, Nina on "Everwood," was the woman trying to figure out who is the father of her surrogate baby. Peter recognized Becky Wahlstrom, Grace on "Joan of Arcadia," was the surrogate mother. Raphael Sbarge was the man who hadn't slept with his wife in a year and a half. We saw at the beginning of "24" this season (remember his family lived across the street from the teen terrorist). He was also Jake on "The Guardian."
Michelle recognized Rebecca Gayheart as the woman whose fiance died in a fire they started on "CSI: Miami." She played reporter Judy Nash on "Vanished," Betty on "Dead Like Me," but, of course, she's once and forever Dylan's doomed wife Toni on "90210." Plus, she's married to McSteany (Eric Dane) in real life. We'll see Gayheart this week on "Ugly Betty" as Alexis' ex-girlfriend.
Adam was the first reader to be delighted by the "Rudy" reunion on "My Name is Earl." Sean Astin, Rudy himself (and Lynn McGill last season on "24") and his brother Mackenzie Astin (Kate's doomed boyfriend on "Lost") were the salesmen. Charles Dutton, the groundskeeper, and Chelcie Ross, the coach, were also in the episode. And as so many of you pointed the speech Dutton gives Earl at the end of the episode was straight out of "Rudy." My friends, this is the official definition of good times.
This Week's Answer to Last Week's Question of the Week
Last week I asked you if you would be less likely to tune into serialized dramas given all the quick cancellations this year. And now it's time to put the networks officially on notice. Because you guys are not happy. At all. You're upset about "The Nine," "The Black Donnellys," "Smith" and "Six Degrees." Some of your anger dates back to "Freaks and Geeks," "Firefly," "Wonderfalls" and "Reunion." Well, the list is endless.
And I think I've hit on the main problem. Many of you TiVo a show you're interested in and wait to see if it makes it. If a show is cancelled, you delete the episodes from your DVR or TiVo because what's the point of watching something and being left hanging.
So listen up all you networks. TV Gal readers are mad as hell and they are not going to take it any more. If you don't change your ways, everyone may head to cable where most deals guarantee that every episode of a first season will be aired no matter what the ratings (see "Dirt").
Highlights of the Week Ahead
All times listed are Eastern Time for May 7 to 13
"How I Met Your Mother" kicks off the first part of its two-part season finale Monday at 8 p.m. on CBS. I loved these two final episodes and I'll give you a hint. We saw a scene from the finale in last week's episode.
Rumor has it that someone is going to die on "24" (Monday, FOX, 9 p.m.) this week and all I can say is please, please, please let President Palmer live. Thanks ever so.
I don't want to brag. but back in my Feb. 26 column, I predicted that Lakisha Jones, Brandon Rogers, Blake Lewis and Jordin Sparks would make it to the final four of "American Idol" (Tuesday, FOX, 8 p.m.). And I'm not sad because three out of four ain't bad. This week they sing songs of the Bee Gees.
Well despite our pleas, "Gilmore Girls" (Tuesday, CW, 8 p.m.) has been officially canceled and will not return for an 8th season. That means we only have two episodes left and that the series finale was filmed before the writers or the actors knew it would be the series finale. I said my peace about this a couple of weeks ago but I want to again reiterate: "Boooooo." This is no way to treat a beloved series with loyal fans. They should have decided much earlier that this would be the last season. It's not a heart-wrenching cancelation a la "Arrested Development" or "Everwood," but it still stings. If you want to hear Lauren Graham talk about the cancelation, tune into "Ellen" (check local listings) on Tuesday. This week, look for Christopher to return and for Lorelai and Luke to move closer to a reunion.
Paul Rudd is the guest star on "Veronica Mars" (Tuesday, CW, 9 p.m.). But what I really want to talk about is the Piz/Veronica situation. As I mentioned last week, I am ready for Veronica to be in a new romance free of drama and damage. Yes, obviously, Veronica and Logan still love each other and the actors have great chemistry ,and you know that Logan is one of my all-time favorite TV characters. But I think I want to see both Veronica and Logan in healthier relationships. But how about you? Do you want Veronica and Logan back together or are you happy to see them with other people?
Joy is on trial in the second season finale of "My Name Is Earl" (Thursday, NBC, 8 p.m.) But things are looking up for Earl. He has a job, a new apartment and even the return of his love interest (Christine Taylor). After a rocky start to its second season, the series is going out on a strong note.
Whoo-hoo. Melinda Clarke returns as Lady Heather on "CSI" (Thursday, CBS, 9 p.m.). Me thinks Sara is not going to be too happy about that.
I again ask is anyone believing this George/Izzie romance? Anyone? Also if we're planning to commit adultery, can we not do it in the elevator where your wife works? After three seasons, the interns first year is finally over as they take their exams on "Grey's Anatomy" (Thursday, ABC, 9 p.m.)
Jeffrey Dean Morgan reprises his role as papa Winchester on the two-part season finale of "Supernatural" (Thursday, CW, 9 p.m.).
It's a deja vu adieu for "7th Heaven" Sunday at 8 p.m. on CW. Sure there's nary a Camden kid left in Glen Oak, but it's nice to see the show going out on a much stronger note that it did the first time it cried "this is our series finale." There's no bizarre Oreos product placement and no threat of a weird twinapoolza ending. I like the idea of Lucy and Kevin heading out on their own while Annie and Eric embrace new adventures. I'm still annoyed with how The CW scheduled the show this year (it was like a game: Can you find "7th Heaven" this week?), but I'm looking forward to the finale.
So, no one really thinks Gabby is going to marry Victor, right? I just keep hoping they will give Gabby more of a real story line on "Desperate Housewives" (Sunday, ABC, 9 p.m).
I don't know how I forgot to mention John Pyper-Ferguson, who plays Joe on "Brothers & Sisters" (Sunday, ABC, 10 p.m.), as one of my favorite less is more actors. He is palpably believable. He's so good that I don't despise him for kissing Rebecca. This week Tommy and Julia deal with the health crisis of one of their twins and three real life veterans -- Toni Torres, Zachary Stockdale Skylar T. Adams -- guest star as Justin prepares to depart for Iraq.
That's all for today. So much TV, so little time. I'll be back next week with your picks for the best less is more actors on TV (look for shout outs to the Todd, Amanda and Kenneth the Page), the series finale of "Gilmore Girls," the season finale of "CSI," what's happening on "Lost" and a look at some of the shows that have been thinking outside the box. Have a question, seen a familiar face or want to nominate a quote of the week. Write me at firstname.lastname@example.org.Copyright © 2014, Los Angeles Times