Generation Y Need Not Apply

It’s not that John Dunn thinks that teen-agers are a universally loathsome subset of humanity. He’s met some who are a credit to their age group. And Dunn knows very well that, were it not for the young crowd--the kind that sometimes call themselves Generation Y because they follow Generation X--his Ventura Boulevard coffeehouse would not be nearly so famous.

If you haven’t heard of the Insomnia Cafe, either you don’t live in the Sherman Oaks neighborhood that has clashed with Dunn for last 3 1/2 years or you don’t watch much MTV.

It was in spring that the Insomnia, already known for attracting a young crowd, had MTV drop by to shoot promos for its airing of reruns of “My So-Called Life,” the teen angst drama that won a loyal but not sufficiently large following in its single season on ABC. So teens everywhere were watching TV and getting a vicarious thrill watching 16-year-old Claire Danes and the other cool young stars sipping cappuccino at the Insomnia.

What happened next was kind of cute. Soon fan mail arrived c/o the Insomnia. Sometimes, the phone would ring and it would be some nervous kid asking to speak with Claire. And, of course, more and more teen-agers started showing up at the door.

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John Dunn has since decided this latter development wasn’t so cute after all. The problem with teen-agers, Dunn says, wasn’t just that they didn’t spend enough money. They’d yell across the room, put their feet up on the furniture, bring in bags from Jack-In-The-Box. “The element that was coming in here--I’m sure they’re good kids,” Dunn says. “They just haven’t learned social skills yet.” This made older people with money more likely to stay away.

So Dunn, 36, is making the Insomnia a “members only” coffeehouse. Show up at the Insomnia and, unless you have pimples and/or wear a baseball cap backward, there’s a good chance the doorman will hand you a shiny gold “Private Membership Card.” Dunn is even considering valet parking.

Roll over, Kerouac. One can only imagine how Ginsberg might howl:

I saw the best minds of my generation

Destroyed by golden membership

Yes, there is something jarring about the idea of a restricted coffeehouse. We prefer the romantic image of the ‘50s, of dark places populated by subversive folk singers and deep thinkers and political whispers about “the people.”

But the coffeehouses of the ‘90s are their own phenomenon. There may be poetry readings and open mike nights, but in some, such as the Insomnia, you may find a customer tapping at a computer into some esoteric game on the Web. There’s plenty of social conversation, but you may overhear a business deal in the works.

Dunn led me to an easy chair in the elevated “library” of his 941-square-foot club. A collection of Cole Porter came over the stereo, not too loud. The proprietor explained how the Insomnia reflected a personal evolution. Dunn had gotten his start producing events at The Roxy, and for several years he operated something called Le Hot Club. In 1989, he stopped using alcohol and drugs. In the Insomnia he wanted to create a place that conformed to his own lifestyle.

It was popular from the start--too popular. At first, the club was open until 3 a.m. on weeknights and 4 a.m. Fridays and Saturdays, triggering a fight with neighbors. A year ago the City Council ordered new closing times of 11 p.m. week nights and 1 a.m. weekends, and when Dunn was found guilty of failing to obey those orders, he wound up in court. Dunn has paid a $3,200 fine and, if caught serving coffee past 11 p.m. on a weeknight, he may do time cleaning up graffiti along the freeway.

Teen-agers came because there weren’t many places to hang out. Parents didn’t mind; some probably remember how they used to kill time when they were that age. They’d rather have them at a coffeehouse playing board games than out at a park getting drunk or stoned.

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Although teens aren’t strictly forbidden, Dunn expresses hopes that the new policy will win the Insomnia new friends in the neighborhood. Once combative, he’s now trying to make nice with residents and nearby merchants. Maybe if he creates a teen-free zone, the Insomnia will be able to stay open later.

It’s a shrewd move, especially if the grown-ups come back. The teen-agers who are now persona non grata may very well feel used and abused. It’s not fair, but they’ll encounter greater troubles. Besides, there are other coffeehouses. A few blocks west of the Insomnia is The Horseshoe, which was doing brisk business at midnight Tuesday.

One group kicked the Hacky-Sack out front. Inside, 16-year-old Sean Smith, baseball cap turned backward, was hanging with friends.

“The Insomnia’s kind of screwed up now,” Smith said. “There’s nobody going there anymore.”