Glendale is boring (“Glendale to get 'animated' in image makeover,” Dec. 1)! Stop the presses!
Let me stifle a yawn and say that Glendale has always been to boredom what the Vatican is to Roman Catholicism: ground zero.
Some will whimper and whine and wish to debate this long into the night. Please don’t. There is now a $139,000 worth of market research to back it up.
The truth of the matter is that we Glendalians prefer boring. To us, it is a term of endearment. That’s why we elect certified public accountants, civil engineers and attorneys to the City Council.
That’s why we also shop in Montrose and have a float in the Tournament of Roses Parade every year (though this year, we came close to missing it).
However, our hipster Tennessee (come on, really?) consultant friends tell us it’s time for Rip van Glendale to wake-up and smell the Starbucks, and with emphasis on the “bucks.” So we’ve all been newly branded as “Animated!”
I must confess all this writing has made me a bit drowsy. Time for my nap.
Perhaps I’ll dream of the creative ways Forest Lawn Memorial Park will incorporate our new brand into its operations. How about: “Your Life: Animated!”
Truly a brand suitable for a Mickey Mouse town with a million bucks to blow.