This is an open letter to Kerry Morford and Jano Baghdanian,
requesting permission to enter the Rossmoyne/Mountain traffic-calming
plan in the Rube Goldberg Contest for the most elaborate and complex
design for achieving the simplest task.
Nearly six years ago, residents of the Rossmoyne/Mountain neighborhood
approached the city to help with speeding traffic on the streets by
installing stop signs at every intersection. We were told by Mr. Morford
and company that stop signs were not the answer. They told us the answer
was speed humps. Okaaay ... a neighborhood committee will round up
support for speed humps, since we can’t have stop signs.
When it was determined that the speed humps were working, residents
asked for a few more to be installed in areas that had been missed. The
fire department claimed speed humps were too detrimental to response
times, and it suggested traffic circles. (Never mind that Glendale seems
to have the only emergency response vehicles in the country that are
significantly slowed down by speed humps.) It’s worth repeating ... the
fire department requested traffic circles.
The neighborhood committee once again said, okaaay ... if we can’t
have a few more humps, we will try to sell the traffic circles to the
residents. This was no easy task. They are dangerous, marginally
effective, ugly, and a concept for much wider streets. No surprise to
anyone, all hell broke loose, and nobody liked anything about the
measures that had been taken.
It’s now being said that most of the Rossmoyne/Mountain
traffic-calming plan is going to be ripped out and replaced in large part
by stop signs! Rube would be proud.