Copyright © 2019, Los Angeles Times | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy

Letter -- Judy Lloyd

When we lose compassion for “the other side,” we lose our ability to

resolve problems. If we can’t or won’t have empathy with their situation,

the “other side” will simply remain angry and tune us out.

Oscar Asbed Pogarian and Lenore Solis took a revolutionary approach to


Iva Carrico in their recent letters to the News-Press. Instead of

condemning Iva, they offered her empathy. Instead of punishment, they

offered compassion. At the same time, they made it clear that they

strongly disagree with, and feel saddened by, the words she spoke before


the City Council.

These two people managed to stay connected to their compassionate

nature under extremely trying circumstances. How did they do that?

We are fortunate to have a wonderful nonprofit resource in our midst

that teaches people how to do what these two did. The Center for

Nonviolent Communication, which recently moved its headquarters to La

Crescenta, was founded by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg, an internationally

renowned peacemaker. The center teaches “nonviolent communication.” which


is described as “the lost language of humankind, the language of a people

who care about one another and long to live in harmony.” The center is

developing a nonviolent communication curriculum for schools.

Rosenberg is rarely at the center because he teaches nonviolent

communication in major “hot spots” throughout the world. His goal is to

help people and governments resolve what seem to be unresolvable

conflicts. Rosenberg has also written a book, “Nonviolent Communication,

a Language of Compassion,” that is a guide for those who want to resolve


conflicts and create better relationships.

If you long for peace and harmony here in Glendale, contact the center

and find out about nonviolent communication. The phone number is

957-6493. Gary Baran is the center’s director. If you prefer to contact

me for more information, my e-mail address is

We can make this city a better place for all of us if we have the

right tools.