Author Joan Anderson explores her friendship with a mentor in new book

A best-selling author, Joan Anderson has appeared on the Oprah Winfrey Show and the Today Show. With publication of her newest book, “A Walk on the Beach: Tales of Wisdom from an Unconventional Woman,” Anderson is heading out on an eight-city book tour that will include an appearance at... Once Upon a Time.

It is unusual that top authors come to such a small bookstore, but Anderson owes a lot to the only bookstore in Montrose. “Once Upon a Time was the first bookstore to write me a personal letter and say they thought ‘A Year by the Sea’ was one of the best books they’d ever read,” Anderson told the Valley Sun in an interview from Northern California where she was hosting a women’s retreat. “So on my first visit, when I was a totally unknown author, I made a point of doing an event at Once Upon a Time.”

Although previous owner Jane Humphrey retired last year, the new owner of this community bookstore continues to support Anderson. Anderson, who lives on Cape Cod, counts Once Upon a Time among her biggest supporters. “I think single-handedly, they’ve sold thousands of the first book, probably more than any other bookstore in the country,” she said.

Anderson has now written three books for adults (after a career as a children’s book author), a trilogy of memoirs that tell how she re-discovered herself after decades as a wife and mother. Her first book, “A Year by the Sea,” tells of how she ran away to live by herself in a cottage on Cape Cod when her husband told her they’d be moving to a new city for his job.

Her second book, “An Unfinished Marriage,” tells of her husband’s experience retiring from his job and moving to Cape Cod with her. “He wanted some of what I had,” Anderson said. “‘Unfinished Marriage’ is about his year by the sea.”

The third in the series, “A Walk on the Beach,” tells of Anderson’s friendship with Joan Erikson, a frail elderly woman she met while walking on a Cape Cod beach one foggy afternoon. Erikson, though past age 90, turned out to be anything but frail intellectually, and became both a friend and mentor who showed Anderson how to find herself and how to live the second half of her life.

“Joan Erikson believed that once you get through this period of child-raising, it is your responsibility to pass on what you know,” Anderson said. The book is Anderson’s way of passing on to others what Erikson taught her.

Erikson was the wife and collaborator of Erik Erikson, the psychoanalyst who identified the eight stages of life and coined the phrase “identity crisis.” Anderson still finds it remarkable that she should happen to meet Joan Erikson while going through an identity crisis.

Through the constant encouragement of Erikson, Anderson began to find herself and eventually to see that she has a vocation-one might call it a calling-to help other women see how vital it is to take care of and nurture themselves. Anderson has parlayed this vocation into another career, leading women’s retreats.

“Because we are compassionate individuals by nature, women give to others before we nurture ourselves,” Anderson said. “Over time we wear ourselves down. It’s no one’s fault, it’s just the way the culture is. So of course we need a retreat once in a while.”

Anderson’s books have struck a chord with women all over the world, as evidenced by the fact that her first book has been translated into 20 languages. She focuses on teaching women what to expect of their life after the time they identify as wife and mother.

“We’re all of us unfinished,” she said. “Every minute, life changes. Every minute you’re being thrown a curveball.”

Anderson will sign “A Walk on the Beach” April 18, at 4 p.m. at Once Upon a Time, located at 2284 Honolulu Ave. in Montrose. For more information, call 248-9668.