Memories of a Christmas pageant past

Of all the Christmas pageants I’ve attended over the years, the ones I remember most are the ones I was in as a child and the ones my own children were in. Although 30 years separated the performances, I was amused, and just a little bit heartened, to see that not much had changed in the staging of a Christmas Spectacular starring 8- to 12-year-olds. “A Christmas Carol,” 1988 at R.D. White Elementary School went something like this.

After the audience calmed down, the principal came out to welcome us all. Directly behind her a cast of young performers were making last-minute preparations to the accompaniment of hammering and things dropping. Before the curtain went up, the school orchestra (all 17 members) and chorus performed.

There is something altogether unique about the sound made by two clarinets, three trumpets, 10 violins, a tuba and a drum accompanying an all-soprano chorus of students dressed like little birds.

I learned that “Good King Wenceslas” has more than five choruses and that “Silent Night” has a part for the snare drum. I also learned that despite all of the screeching and squeaking and blaring and pounding, and in the midst of cracking voices and missed notes, it was sweet music that came through to us all. (I seem to recall my own parents sitting through the same five choruses performed by my fourth-grade class of about 30 “fluto-phonists,” all of us squeaking in unison.)

After the audience sang along to “The Twelve Days of Christmas,” aided by 12 second-graders holding giant cue cards, the play was about to begin. With great ceremony, one side of the curtain was drawn back while the other, being caught on something, had to be pulled open by the stage crew. Someone whispered loudly, “Put out the lights,” and we were plunged into darkness. At the same time, the stage lights went on, revealing the interior of Scrooge’s office, with a London skyline in the background. “Marley was dead ... ,” began the narrator. Enter Scrooge, as mean and avaricious as ever. He was played by a very energetic young lady who was determined to get across just how mean her character was. She wore a moustache, which was given a twist each time a particularly cruel line was delivered. When told that the poor would starve without charitable contributions, she gave a most sinister laugh and, as an aside to the audience, said through gritted teeth, “Better to decrease the surplus population.” This produced a grand effect, eliciting shrill whistles and boos from the little boys in the front row. After a visitation of the second Christmas ghost, the curtain was drawn for an intermission.

At this point there was a great commotion and jangling of bells offstage. A sixth-grade teacher emerged suddenly from behind the curtains as a rather poorly disguised Santa. His “Ho! Ho! Ho!” was followed by a popular demonstration for him by his students as he advanced to the footlights. “I have a note here from your principal,” he said. “Cake and cookies and fudge and ice cream are being served by the PTA in the library during intermission. You children in the front are reminded to walk in single file.” This announcement was followed by a general stampede to the library. The fudge, having been contributed by the same loving mother for the past five years, was the featured item and even had a few parents (like me) bolting for the exit.

Twenty minutes and 5,000 calories later, a very loud school bell brought us back to our seats for the finale. Scrooge repented and Tiny Tim came forward to bless us all, each and everyone. Bows were taken while cameras and video recorders at every other seat captured the magic of the moment. The orchestra ended the evening with a rousing, “We Wish you a Merry Christmas.”

I look forward to a third generation of Christmas pageants when/if any grandchildren should come along in the Kimber family. (If one of my daughters should read this, no pressure intended.) For now I am content to relive memories of great performances of Christmases past.

* DAN KIMBER is a teacher in the Glendale Unified School District, where he has taught for more than 30 years. He may be reached at dkimb8@aol.com.

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