Costantino Delli once lived in an apartment on Park Avenue in New York and reaped the benefits of working in the corporate world.
But despite his success and privileged lifestyle, Delli wasn’t completely satisfied with himself. He would wake up in the middle of the night, unhappy with who he was and what he was doing.
“I had to figure why I was so upset with myself,” Delli, a Glendale resident, said.
“I just kind of broke down and I realized that I had to rebuild myself and I learned that there were a lot of things that I kept inside.”
In January 1996, Delli, 43, started a daily journal of his thoughts and learned that he had yet to deal with issues from the past, he said. As a child, he had witnessed his parents’ marriage fall apart because of abuse and he really hadn’t dealt with the emotions he felt.
“I was just writing thoughts of what I was feeling,” he said.
A year later, he realized that he could help others so he started doing life coaching work — personal workshops on self-improvement.
In 2005, he decided to write a book about his own experiences and incorporate guidelines for self-improvement.
Last year, he wrote the first draft of the book, “The Way: Live Your Dream, It’s not a Secret!”
And in July, Delli’s first self-published work hit the bookstores.
“With writing, I realized that I was onto something for rebuilding and reconnecting with wisdom, nurturing relationships and improving my life,” he said.
The book provides a guideline for gaining the wisdom and strength needed for personal fulfillment.
Delli talks about simple exercises, such as journal writing to gain an insight into unresolved issues.
He discusses different “inner and outer steps” that can be taken to improve oneself.
The first inner step is to write into a daily journal, Delli said.
Writing allows a person to assess life issues and helps to release negativity, he added, which can create a sense of peace.
The inner steps are derived from Delli’s own personal experiences, the arts and nature, he said. To become one with nature — taking a walk in the park or running on the beach — is an inner step, if applied, leads to progress, he added.
Whereas, the outer steps focus on how to interact with the world and are derived from business principals, he added.
“There are five steps I’ve used in business,” Delli said.
“One step is that you want to leverage what is good in a particular situation. I translate that into the first outer step — living with no loose ends. If you say or do and write something that is positive and you don’t follow through with it, that is a loose end. You end up with clutter.”
What makes his book different from other self-helps is the simple message and language the book is written in, Delli said.
“People are connecting with the message that it’s not a big secret to be connected with goodness,” he said. “What I offer in my book is more practicality and a reminder that we all have something special in all of us.”
Some readers of Delli’s book have followed the outlined guidelines and applied them to their own lives.
Glendale resident Paul McKernan claims to be a “self-help junkie” after reading “The Way.” He believes he has become a better communicator since he’s started the journal-writing process.
“What I started was the process of self-healing by really evaluating my life,” he said.
“I started reevaluating my history with my family. I realized I didn’t have a good view of what was going on because I was too opinionated.”
Other readers, including Chris Haas, have found the book to be inspirational. Since keeping a journal, Haas has seen an improvement in how much he is able to get things done.
“I think as crazy as it sounds, I have so many things going on, and I probably won’t want to accomplish half the things if I don’t write it down,” Haas, a Burbank resident, said.
Haas has also benefited from the inner steps in that he’s now more inclined to exercise outdoors to reap the benefits nature has to offer.
“As far as nature and solitude, I’ve started to get out and I’ve started to run the trails instead of the treadmill,” he said.