When it comes to social media, Kim Kardashian is nothing if not disciplined. Her husband Kanye West? Not so much.
Apparently, we learned Tuesday, his Twitter rants bug the living boo-yah out of his wife, if an unnamed People source is to be believed. And yes, we very much want to believe.
"What causes friction in the marriage ... is Kanye's compulsive tweeting," the source told the outlet. "Kim can't stand it. She is all for self-promotion, but doesn't approve of Twitter drama."
She is all for self-promotion, but she doesn't approve of Twitter drama.
Someone on Etsy should turn that into a throw pillow, stat.
Kanye's definitely been tossing out plenty to keep her annoyed in recent days: He's been going for broke on social media, flowing from topic to topic with look-there's-a-shiny-thing agility and serving up bursts of opinion and explanation. He'd announced Sunday that he was carrying $53 million in personal debt and asked Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg to invest a billion dollars in "Kanye West ideas."
(There's been no response so far from Zuckerberg, another high-profile person who is, not surprisingly, rather disciplined when it comes to social media. Go figure.)
The day after that funding pitch, which some didn't think was all that awesome, he tried to explain the difference between broke and being in business-related debt. (Hey, have Kanye and the Donald been talking?
"Yes I am personally rich and I can buy furs and houses for my family but I need access to more money in order to bring more beautiful ideas to the world," West said in a series of tweets. "If I spent my money on my ideas I could not afford to take care of my family. I am in a place that so many artist end up. Also for anyone that has money they know the first rule is to use other people's money."
He continued on the topic of money: "I am ultra light beaming right now," West wrote, beginning another series of tweets and echoing Charlie Sheen's warlock-tiger blood-winning period. (A former collaborator has suggested that those echoes might be speaking volumes. Or more likely, Mr. West was just slipping in a plug for the lead track on his newest album.)
"So many people have called or emailed to help today hedge fund guys billionaires etc... I know I confuse you guys sometimes but please bare with me," he continued, in what I choose to believe was a "damn you, autocorrect" moment.
"This is a God dream," he wrote, dipping again into his lyrics bucket. "But if the self proclaimed cockiest person in the world can lay his personal business on the line then please people see my heart. No matter what level you're at in life there is still a struggle and a balance art family perception friends family politics and the ... manipulators."
Then, as midnight came and went Monday night, he kicked off an explanation of his explanation, thusly:
Financial issues could, in theory, cost him his family. "[I]f you don’t have your paper right, there's a chance that your family can be broken up," West tweeted.
And Monday afternoon — just for fun, perhaps? — he called out "white publications" and "black music," one of which he believes should have nothing to say about the other. He apparently didn't like Pitchfork's 9-points-out-of-10 review of his new album, "The Life of Pablo"?
"To Pitchfork, Rolling Stone, New York Times, and any other white publication. Please do not comment on black music anymore. ... I love love love white people but you don't understand what it means to be the great grandson of ex slaves and make it this far. The system is designed for colored people to fail and one of our only voices is music. One of our only ways out is music."
OK, maybe that whole bit wasn't just for grins.
Which brings us to Tuesday afternoon, he proceeded to tell a completely unrelated story — well, almost completely, as debt was once again mentioned — that might be 100% expected in a president's State of the Union address.
Oh wait, maybe it actually was a draft — of a future SOTU speech?
President West, #2020.
Meanwhile, Kardashian, showing her typical restraint, was tweeting a picture of how she uses tape — masking, duct, even painters, though gaffers works the best — to restrain her breasts, so she can serve up perfect breast-itude when the cameras are clicking.
"My red carpet cleavage secret," she wrote, attaching a risque image aimed at luring fans to her subscription-only website.
Twitter drama? What Twitter drama? For Kimye, it's all in a day's work. And in other Kanye news, Taylor Swift knocked him out big time at the end of the Grammy Awards, without even speaking his name.
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