‘I kinda had a feeling’
AND so it ends.
The Sanjaya saga, destined to go down in “American Idol” history as one of the show’s great subplots, has run its course. Sanjaya Malakar will forever stand alongside such storied also-rans as Kellie Pickler, Constantine Maroulis and Carmen Rasmusen. But the fantasy that this hula-dancing 17-year-old could topple the “American Idol” industrial complex is over and dead.
It was a humbled Sanjaya who stepped out of the “America Idol” bubble and faced the media Thursday in the traditional post-results conference. (For the uninitiated, newly eliminated contestants are put on the phone each week for half an hour with, it sounds like, about a billion reporters from every corner of the globe.)
The conversation had the semi-pathetic tone of a very young kid squirming under questioning from a bunch of big serious adults. But Sanjaya unequivocally distanced himself from the antihero status he had gained during the course of the competition thanks to a number of spoiler campaigns, and any suggestion that he was treating the show like one big joke.
Sanjaya insisted he was in the competition to win it (although he realized he probably wouldn’t) and was just trying his hardest to let his personality shine through. Sanjaya pooh-poohed his leading cheerleaders saying, “I don’t think votefortheworst or Howard Stern had enough people voting for me to make a dent in anything. I think the reason why I’m here is the support of my fans.”
Sanjaya said he knew Angel of Death Ryan Seacrest was headed his way Wednesday after watching a recap of the previous night’s competition. “I kinda had a feeling. And then I was kinda in the dumps all day Wednesday.... I kinda knew.”
He said he never felt animosity from the other contestants: “Not at all, everyone is a family. That was the hardest part of leaving, leaving the extended part of my family.”
And most important, he said, he was never trying to make a mockery of the proceedings: “My philosophy was to stay true to myself and try to put my personality out there.” (Of course, what else would a mischievous teenager say when called into the principal’s office?)
He did read blogs and Web coverage, and it wasn’t long before he realized America had indeed entered the Sanjaya Universe.
“I think it kind of trickled in. It’s been kinda surreal for me. We truly are in a bubble, we don’t have the slightest idea of the capacity of the show. I got an inkling every once in a while of something different. Something going on, I guess a cultural phenomenon.”
As for the thinking behind his dizzying array of hairstyles? “At a certain point that had sorta become my thing. Everyone looks for something to grab onto with each contestant, that was my ‘back atcha.’ ”
He says he plans to look at a music career, as well as acting and modeling. “And possibly Broadway.”
And don’t worry Simon, no hard feelings. “From the beginning I think Simon had hopes for me and when I didn’t fill that potential, he was disappointed. He’s an amazing person and what he does is awesome, but I learned more from him than anyone else in the competition.”
Just as in every election cycle starry-eyed dreamers are forced to learn that being engagingly unhinged is not what gets one to the White House, so too are the discontents at the fringes of the “Idol” galaxy forced to learn that America chooses its Idols based on solid performing skills (mostly) and bona-fide, unironic star quality.
The very best singer may not come in first, but anti-establishment appeal can get a singer like Scott “The Body” Savol and Kevin “Chicken Little” Covais as high as No. 5, but no higher. So once again, the anarchists’ quixotic dreams of mayhem are dashed and the wisdom of the people prevails.
It was a tense scene in the Idoldome for Wednesday’s elimination night. As with the Tuesday night crowd, the audience members were at times so rabid in their enthusiasm they seemed at points on the brink of rioting. As Seacrest divided the contestants into perplexing clusters on stage, loud, vigorous murmurs of dissent sprung from the crowd straining to understand.
Before the high-low split was announced, Melinda Doolittle was asked to repeat last’s year’s gambit -- put to Taylor Hicks -- what seems the winners’ droit du seigneur of choosing which group to side with.
Melinda, in her fashion, restaged Hicks’ refusal to choose between her comrades, defying Seacrest’s command to similar rapturous applause from the crowd.
A perplexing transformation occurred when the split was announced.
After learning he was in the bottom three, Sanjaya seemed to burst into deep sobbing. All through the break, the other contestants hugged, embraced, rubbed and consoled Sanjaya, even Blake Lewis and LaKisha Jones, who were in the same boat, took stabs at calming him.
What is perplexing is that Sanjaya has been in the bottom three before and took it in stride. As he said earlier, perhaps he sensed that his nine lives had run out.
And after the coup de grace was delivered, as the audience erupted in a huge cheer (more for LaKisha’s salvation then Sanjaya’s ouster), Sanjaya let out a deep mournful sob, clinging to LaKisha all through the Sanjaya “Going Home” montage.
Finally, before the lights came up, the stage manager crept up and extracted Kiki from his grip, leaving the show’s antihero to make that final walk from which no contestant returns, alone.
After the credits rolled, the other contestants, whatever they may have felt about Sanjaya in the past, stayed on stage to wrap him in a giant group hug. As the now Final Six walked off -- Melinda consoling LaKisha, who looked fairly shaken up by her brush with termination -- Sanjaya stayed on stage hugging each and every member of the band, the judges, the crew, everyone he could get his hands on -- the loyal opposition to the last.
Sanjaya rides off into the sunlight of what no doubt will be a dazzling media tour. (Among the stops: a Thursday night appearance on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno).
For “American Idol,” the question becomes what shall be the story line of the final weeks.
If a Blake, a LaKisha or even a Melinda had been thrown off, we would all be feeling differently. But it’s a ritual we understand. The “Idol” public has known that heartbreak and survived.
But we are defined by that which we are against. As hard as it would be to lose our heroes, losing our enemies may be an even greater challenge. There is little fat to cut now -- few clear-cut questions of good-versus-evil left to play themselves out.
Apres Sanjaya, le deluge.