Downsizing trend reaches the North Pole

Off Donner! Off Blitzen!

Uh, oh. Christmas deliveries figure to be slower this year, pointed out S. Moore of Long Beach.

Moore read that Santa has laid off most of his reindeer and, in this uncertain economy, he’s apparently put off making repairs on his sleigh (see accompanying).

Unclear on the concept: Myrna and Jim Cambianica of Ojai saw an ad for a residence that only a real estate agent would call a condo (see accompanying).

Food for thought: David Brown of Calabasas spotted a main course that will just light up your dinner table (see accompanying).

And for dessert: Richard Snyder of Woodland Hills chanced upon a cruller that is “cruel” -- no doubt to your waistline (see accompanying).

To live and drive in L.A.: “Black Money,” Ross Macdonald’s 1960s L.A. mystery novel, is as timely as ever, points out reader Art Purcell. Especially this passage: “The afternoon traffic fled by on the left. The drivers looked apprehensive, as if they had been kidnapped by their cars.”

You know how those Westsiders are: Purcell also noticed a bank in Pacific Palisades that is “apparently into the electronic and mystical age. It had a sign on the back door that said E TRANCE.”

Life can be so complicated: The crime log of the Laguna Niguel News recorded a call from a resident who complained “someone had let her dogs out. She didn’t want a deputy, however, as she was suing the government.”

Hmmm: I mentioned that Laguna Beach police received a complaint about “a large hummingbird flying aggressively around a residence.”

Well, Terri Lau of North Hollywood says the terrified resident may have had reason to be fearful.

“I, too, had a run-in with the same species several years ago,” she said.

“I was hiking with a friend on top of Half Dome in Yosemite when an aggressive hummingbird appeared out of nowhere. (Don’t ask me what it was doing on Half Dome.) My friend and I were even more amazed when it swooped down and pecked me on the head, flying away with a piece of my scalp. This is a true story even though nobody believes me when I tell it.”

I believe you. Having written this column for 18 years, nothing surprises me anymore.

miscelLAny: Montclair, which is celebrating its 50th birthday, acquired its name through a local contest. The Claremont Courier says that rejected names included Montezuma, U-topia, Magnetic City, Brooklyn, Kimona (combining Pomona and Covina), Whisky Vistie (in honor of a local liquor store) and Montevideo.

Columnist David Allen of the Inland Valley Daily Bulletin wrote that it’s a shame that the city passed on that last candidate, depriving some entrepreneur of the opportunity to open “a store named Montevideo Video.”

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083; by fax at (213) 237-4712; by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012; and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.