Let’s hope tourists have a killer time on ‘Hotel Horrors’ tour

Just what the Los Angeles Convention and Visitors Bureau needs: Esotouric bus tour company’s historic expedition through L.A. on Sept. 8 is titled, “Hotel Horrors.”

The 90-minute, $25 bus adventure will savor bad deeds done in such venues as the Alexandria, Rosslyn and Cecil hotels; the latter was the sometime home of serial killer Richard “Night Stalker” Ramirez.

Included will be the tale of the unfortunate chocolate salesman from San Francisco who was at a party, sitting on a window ledge with another man, at the Hayward Hotel one December night in 1929.

Someone told a joke, The Times reported the next day, and the two men “laughed heartily at the pun. And then a shrill scream broke the stillness of the night as they lost their balance and plunged backward through the darkness of an air shaft and seven stories to their death.”

I hope the partygoers had the good taste afterward not to steal the salesman’s chocolates.

Are we there yet? Carl Ehrlich of Calabasas figures that question could be asked often on a family trip from the Bridgeport area of Northern California to Provincetown, Mass. (see photo).

Unclear on the concept: Reilly Pollard of Goleta spotted a less-than-reassuring slogan on a fast-food joint’s sales receipt (see accompanying).

Thanks for the warning: In Colorado, David DuMond of Westminster observed a hotel just daring tourists to stay there (see photo).

Earthly bargain? At a garage sale in Long Beach, two women were examining a VCR cassette of “The Sixth Sense,” the 1999 Bruce Willis film.

“Do you see dead people?” asked one woman, referring to the famous line in the movie.

“No,” the other answered.

“I’m having a hard time seeing anybody,” admitted the first woman. “I just had cataract surgery.”

Do you see fingers? The Coastal View News reported that a man arrested for public drunkenness was asked by Carpinteria police how many drinks he had consumed. “Three,” he rasped, while holding up two fingers.

“Duh!” award time: Dixie Bliss of Laguna Woods noticed that her new iron carried this warning: “Never iron clothes while they are being worn.” Said Bliss: “Have never tried that one.”

MiscelLAny: Football season is almost here, so I wasn’t surprised to see that a house in my neighborhood was hanging out an “SC” banner. You’d be surprised how many Saddleback College fans there are.

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012, and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.