Matters of life & death

A Mother's Day thank you

He had become a child again, and she fed him, clothed him, cleaned him and soothed him, holding his hand until the end.

To Tony Lopez, with love

My dad never called a tow truck. That would have cost too much.

A father's last days

The hospice nurse said on Tuesday that my father could be gone within 24 hours. It was no surprise. He'd been bedridden for days, and on the list of 10 signs that death is near, he had six or seven.

Love, disease and a killing

A man kills his terminally ill wife. Maybe he ended her pain, but he hasn't found peace for himself.

Open the discussion on dying

Taboos shouldn't prevent us from having important conversations about end-of-life issues to spare loved ones the trauma of making difficult decisions alone.

The right to choose the final exit

Colleen Kegg knows this: When she can no longer feed herself or go to the bathroom without assistance, she will take steps to end her life.

Having to think about the unthinkable

"I could show you case after case," said Dr. Neil S. Wenger. "I could bet you million-to-1 odds these patients would not want to be in this situation."

A terrible choice to ponder

The day after hip surgery, my father asked me to bring him a frozen coffee and something sweet the next morning. I returned to the hospital with a Frappuccino and a doughnut, one or both of which nearly killed him.

Not ready to die, but prepared

The cancer that started 11 years ago has now ravaged the body of Freddie Ramos. It attacked a kidney first, then a lung, and the 57-year-old family man knows that death waits in the near distance.

Doctor doesn’t shy from tough talk

Gene Dorio, an old-school practitioner in Santa Clarita, insists families — and physicians — have honest discussions about end-of-life issues with those in failing health. Too often difficult conversations are put off.

When death is certain, but dignity is not

Last time I wrote about my dad, he’d taken a fall in his bedroom, couldn’t get up, but didn’t want yet another ride in an ambulance. So my mother got down on the floor with him and went to sleep.

Age of innocence and hope

Life is more than arthritis, blood pressure and pills at the 70th reunion of the Manual Arts Class of ’41, the last to graduate before WWII.

At 102, therapist too busy to quit work

Hedda Bolgar, who fled Europe when Hitler entered Austria, says there’s still much she hopes to accomplish. “I'm too busy to die. ”

Waiting calmly to die

Polly Berger, 86, wants to be with her family in full form, not some diminished state. And never as a burden. “You can't dance at every wedding,” Berger said.

Elderly will pay price for Medi-Cal cuts

35,000 seniors in California will soon have nowhere to spend their days. In terms both human and fiscal, this is a penny-wise, dollar-foolish cut.

Waiting in the dark with Dad

I tell myself death can be a blessing, but is that the selfish thinking of someone who can handle the liberating finality of death but can't handle the inconvenient business of dying?

A grieving father's final gift to his son

A barber pays tribute by trimming the hair of his son, claimed by brain cancer, at the funeral home. The burden of loss is lightened by an appreciation of the 39-year-old veteran's life.