Osama, Obama -- Romney trips over his tongue

So, Mitt Romney is in South Carolina talking to a Chamber of Commerce meeting about terrorism, which Republicans tend to do a lot more than Democrats. He was apparently referring to a recent audiotape, allegedly of Osama bin Laden calling on jihadists to assemble for the main fight in Iraq.

“Actually,” Romney said, “just look at what Osam -- Barack Obama -- said yesterday. Barack Obama calling on radicals, jihadists of all different types, to come together in Iraq. That is the battlefield.”

Romney spokesman Kevin Madden immediately admitted the mistake: “He misspoke. He was referring to the audiotape of Osama bin Laden and misspoke. It was just a mix-up.”

Mix-ups are also opposition opportunities. Obama campaign spokesman Bill Burton said, “Apparently, Mitt Romney can switch names just as casually as he switches positions.”

Chuck likes Mike

Savvy Internet surfers know that when a good chuckle is needed to brighten a ho-hum day, one reliable source is “Chuck Norris Facts.” As Wikipedia puts it, in an understatement, the site documents “fictional, often absurdly heroic feats and characteristics” about the martial arts master who parlayed that skill into starring in movies and on television.

The political world now has learned an actual Chuck Norris fact: His favorite in the fight for the Republican presidential nomination is Mike Huckabee, the onetime longshot who seems to be gaining momentum with each passing week. Norris revealed his pick and explained it in a lengthy column posted on WorldNetDaily, a conservative website. After giving quick nods to other major GOP contenders, he describes Huckabee as “the only one who has all of the characteristics to lead America forward into the future.”

Norris, an evangelical Christian who now spends much of his time and money promoting his religious values, is effusive in his praise of Huckabee. So much so that we imagine the former governor of Arkansas will do all he can to make the endorsement required reading in Iowa.

He knew about Schiavo

You may recall, candidate Fred Thompson was asked a few weeks ago about the highly controversial Terri Schiavo right-to-die case from two years ago in which the husband of a Florida woman in a persistent vegetative state wanted to remove her feeding tube. Her parents went to court and Gov. Jeb Bush, Congress and other politicians got into the struggle.

Thompson said he didn’t really recall much about the case, and some people clucked and said, How could he not? Well, Thompson was talking with some reporters last week and, it turns out, he remembers it too well. He just didn’t want to talk about it: Like a growing number of Americans, he had gone through a similar end-of-life decision -- regarding his daughter five years ago.

It probably should not be surprising that a society that cannot agree on when life begins also has yet to fully agree on when life can end. Very few cases reach the courts like Schiavo’s and become political causes. Most are handled quietly among family members and doctors.

Thompson’s 38-year-old daughter, Elizabeth Thompson Panici, who had been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, died in 2002 of an accidental drug overdose six days after being admitted to the hospital unconscious. Thompson’s remarks indicated that she had been put on life support.

Thompson said that as far as he was concerned, such matters “should be decided by families. The federal government, and the state government too -- except for the court system -- ought to stay out of it.”

Then he added, “I will assure you one thing: No matter which decision you make, you will never know whether or not you made exactly the right decision. So making this into a political football is something that I don’t welcome. And this will probably be the last time I ever address it.”

Race for Iowa kudos

In case you’ve been waiting for this, the Storm Lake Times has endorsed its candidate for the Democratic nomination for president. It chose Joe Biden.

This is the first in what is likely to be a string of small-town Iowa newspaper candidate endorsements in the remaining -- what? -- almost 10 weeks before the caucuses.

And the Biden campaign, which despite its hard work there has languished way down in the polls’ single digits, touted the endorsement in e-mails to thousands of Americans as if the endorsement really mattered.

The one Iowa endorsement that has long been deemed important is the Des Moines Register’s. But the paper no longer has a statewide distribution system to reach delivery boxes at the end of long dirt driveways in every corner of the state.

In 2004, that Gannett paper endorsed John Edwards, which wasn’t good enough to bring him victory but did help get him second place in the caucuses behind John Kerry and second place on the Kerry ticket.

This comic looks familiar

So this senator walks into a Washington bar and -- well, no, actually it’s a comedy club. But he walks in and starts doing a stand-up routine. And pretty soon this old guy has got the Capitol crowd in stitches.

So did you hear what happened to Trent Lott’s library? It got ruined by Hurricane Katrina -- both books. And he hadn’t finished coloring one of them.

You know, Ted Kennedy hasn’t been to the Senate gym since the Johnson administration -- the Andrew Johnson administration.

Misspelling “potato” wasn’t Dan Quayle’s worst mistake. He always thought harass was two words.

Believe it or not, this and a whole lot more came out of the mouth of the seemingly serious Sen. Arlen Specter, the craggy-faced, 77-year-old maverick veteran from Pennsylvania, who recently had a stand-up gig at a District of Columbia comedy club.

Meanwhile, asks Specter, did you hear what Moses said when he came down from his mountaintop meeting with God? He said, “The good news is, I got him down to 10. The bad news is, adultery is still in there.”

Dog gone -- the host, too

So, what if they gave a TV show and, as a presidential candidate, you and your spouse showed up to deliver your political messages to millions of viewers but the show’s host didn’t?

According to Times reporter Peter Wallsten, that’s what just happened a week ago Friday to John and Elizabeth Edwards, who had been booked on “The Ellen DeGeneres Show.”

Trouble is, Ellen didn’t show up. The Edwardses arrived to do the show as scheduled. But Ellen was apparently still too distraught over having her former dog “Iggy” repossessed from her hairdresser.

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Excerpted from The Times’ political blog, Top of the Ticket, at www.latimes.com/topof theticket.