Fairness Absent in This System

Faced with the notion that this town’s national-title worthy football team might not even get invited to the dadgum game, everyone’s angry, but at the wrong three letters.

The problem is not with the BCS.

The problem is with USC.

The Trojans should stop scoring -- it was passed in the rankings Monday by a team whose offense has not scored a touchdown in three games.

The Trojans should stop winning blowouts -- it was passed by a team that beat Penn State, San Diego State and Bowling Green by a combined average of less than four points.

The Trojans should stop playing a balanced schedule -- it was passed by a team that has played only three of 11 games on the road, and lost one of them.

That team is Ohio State. At the risk of being punched by the ghost of Woody Hayes, if the one-loss Buckeyes make it to the national-championship game ahead of the one-loss Trojans, then their famous band should dot that “i” with an asterisk.

But that is the scenario painted by the BCS when it jumped Ohio State into second place ahead of USC on Monday because of ... why exactly?

Oh yeah. Over the weekend, the Buckeyes scored no touchdowns on offense while USC scored 45 points. And the Buckeyes won a lucky home game while USC pitched a shutout on the road.

Of course.

As part of the equation, the New York Times computer took one look at the Arizona victory and dropped them two spots, behind two teams with at least two losses each. And you thought Jayson Blair left the paper.

Nellie, whoa, college football has once again lost its mind.

If USC wins its remaining two games and does not play for the national title, it will be the third time in six seasons that the BCS has spammed it.

Two seasons ago, Oregon should have played Miami in the Rose Bowl, but was supplanted by Nebraska, which was blown out by 23 points.

Three seasons ago, Miami should have played Oklahoma in the Orange Bowl, but was aced out by Florida State, which scored all of two points in the loss.

The same thing would happen here if Ohio State were allowed to proceed to New Orleans.

Oklahoma will beat the Buckeyes until they are maize and blue.

The best matchup is with USC. The fairest matchup is with USC. The most-watched matchup would be with USC.

The polls, of course, have already voted for that matchup, ranking USC second behind Oklahoma by every conceivable vote.

Bring back the humans!

Yeah, we once complained so loudly about the unfairness of a poll-based national championship, they changed it. But six years later, we know better.

So worried about this hole in the college football landscape, we allowed somebody to pick at it with all sorts of fancy shovels, thus turning it into a crater.

Our fault. Take it back. Given that university presidents will never approve a college football playoff system costing them guaranteed money and season-ending wins, we have one request.

Can we have our silly, outdated, pockmarked old bowl system again?

Can you imagine the fun we could have this January in that system?

USC would play Ohio State or Michigan in the Rose Bowl.

Oklahoma would play Florida State in the Orange Bowl.

Louisiana State would play Texas in the Sugar Bowl.

The games would spark arguments, the vote would be filled with imperfections, there would be charges of regional bias and running up scores.

But at least it would be honest.

At least, in the end, everyone would recognize that the champion is only a mythical champion.

By pretending to be something else, the BCS is as deceitful as it is complicated.

Did you know that USC could be punked by Ohio State, but if the Buckeyes were to beat the Sooners in the Sugar Bowl and USC were to win the Rose Bowl, the Trojans could still be Associated Press national champions?

The AP poll is not associated with the BCS. It has never crowned a different titlist, but it could.

Think all those guys in Joe Paterno glasses would take notice then?

“I would remind USC fans that the only BCS poll that matters is the one at the end of the year,” said Jerry Palm, a Chicago-based hacker who runs collegebcs.com. “Things that need to happen for them to get into the Sugar Bowl still exist.”

It doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t come down to this.

USC should not have to pay more attention to Saturday’s game in Ann Arbor than its own historic matchup with UCLA.

USC should not have to hope that LSU wins the rest of its games.

And USC should not even have to watch Washington State play Washington, much less cheer for the Cougars as if their title depended on it.

Whatever happened to just winning, baby?

“If USC should be mad at anybody, it should be mad at itself for losing to Cal,” Palm said. “Once you have one loss, you throw yourself on the mercy of the court.”

He’s right. But because the other contenders also have one loss, he’s wrong.

You don’t need binoculars or Beano Cook to see that USC is the second-best team in the country, no matter what Ohio State does this weekend.

A kangaroo court indeed.

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Bill Plaschke can be reached at bill.plaschke@latimes.com.