Katy Perry unsteadily kicked things off with her off-key performance of her new single, “Teenage Dream.” To Perry’s credit, she seemed to be having some trouble with her earpiece, but that still doesn’t explain the awful backup dancers meant to depict classic teenage archtypes: the cheerleaders, football players -- and the nerd in the cardigan and bow tie? Heads up, teens. You’re looking at your generation’s Cher.
Later in the show, Katy Perry mentioned that she never attended high school. Maybe that’s why her images of teenage life seemed to come from “Grease.” (Matt Sayles / Associated Press)
The Teen Choice Awards solved that ever-nagging problem of handing out a lot of awards and simultaneously keeping the show moving along at a fast clip: make the winners present the next award. Before she’d even walked out on stage, first presenter Ellen DeGeneres had already won two awards -- Choice Twit and Choice Comedian. Did she even take a breath between her acceptance speech and the introduction of the next category? We don’t think so. (Matt Sayles / Associated Press)
Where else but the Teen Choice Awards will you see Channing Tatum win an award for anything? Ever? (Jason Merritt / Getty Images)
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Katy Perry shared the stage with the guys from the cast of “Glee,” who gave slow and dramatic readings of the lyrics to Perry’s hit, “ California Gurls” while also sharing their teenage dreams. Most of them involved PG-13 fantasies about Katy Perry. Bonus points to Chris Colfer, however, who revealed his teenage dream: “hosting alone.” (Matt Sayles / Associated Press)
She showed up to pick up the Oscar, the Razzie and the Teen Choice Award. What’s the secret to success in Hollywood? Never pass on an opportunity to be recognized. (Kevin Winter / Getty Images)
The powers that be in Tinseltown will run this poor old girl ragged until she drops. Forget Lindsay Lohan, who’s looking out for Betty White? (Kevin Winter / Getty Images)
This moment. This is the crest of the Justin Bieber wave. The matching white jeans and jean jacket? Evidence of late era excess and decline. The hoody jacket is to Bieber what the jumpsuit was to Elvis. (Moses Robinson / Getty Images)
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Taylor Lautner‘s insincere and slightly smarmy acceptance speech for Choice Smile left the audience cold. Meanwhile, Robert Pattinson’s acceptance speech was utterly unintelligible but charming nonetheless. (Kevin Winter / Getty Images)
Maybe his star is fading: Poor Diddy had to keep urging the audience to get out of their chairs and dance during his performance. Maybe they were just wondering who the old dude was blocking the cool action movie being displayed on the screen behind him. (Matt Sayles / Associated Press)
His awards show appearances are becoming more surreal by the season. His constant presence as a teasing, taunting vampire is his strangest yet. Who was he? Why is he doing what he’s doing? With “Lost” gone forever, we propose making Ken Jeong the prime-time network mystery we must figure out. (Matt Sayles / Associated Press)
We have to credit Perry for trying in her duties as host. Instead of changing into a series of sexy dresses, Perry chose to come out in a series of costumes designed to embody the various people one might encounter in high school (except Perry, who never went). Not all of them were sexy, and not all of them were successful, but at least she was trying something new. And for the Teen Choice Awards, no less. She has an album coming out soon. Her efforts will no doubt be rewarded. (Matt Sayles / Associated Press)