Of course, I am joking. The Los Angeles Unified School District's effort to give Apple iPads to every student has gone terribly.
I have raised three children; they are now 32, 28 and 21. Do you know how many pagers, phones, glasses, jackets, lunch boxes and calculators we have replaced over the years because the people who used them were children and teenagers? How all these educated people in charge of this program failed to consider this before handing out these devices provides some good insight into why L.A. Unified is in the state it's in.
If the district fails at making its own intelligent decisions, how can we expect it'll teach our children to make better ones?
At LAUSD, we seek to provide our students with a quality education and the means to compete for well-paying jobs in the 21st century workplace. These two goals are contingent upon several factors, including providing all students, especially the economically disadvantaged, with the technology to do well in school and embark upon rewarding careers.
It's disappointing that The Times believes that glitches in the largest rollout of its kind in the history of American public education should lead to a reassessment of the entire initiative. At LAUSD, we are not prepared on the basis of easily fixable problems to even consider halting a program that will enable deserving students across this district to achieve success in the classroom and life.
The writer is superintendent of the Los Angeles Unified School District.