Yankees’ Rodriguez could fill the bill

Taking note of the troubles on Wall Street and suggesting that sports teams might have to scale back on salaries, Richard Hinds of the Sydney Morning Herald says it could start with the Yankees, 24 of whose players earned a combined $207,108,489 in 2008.

“We are offering the Yankees a choice,” Hinds wrote. “They can keep 23 players. Or star slugger Alex Rodriguez ($28 million) can play first, second and third base, outfield, pitcher, shortstop, and, when he is not totally exhausted, Madonna.”

Another Hinds suggestion: Eliminate the prize money in golf so that players “can prove they really do love Augusta and St. Andrews so much they would play for nothing.”

Trivia time

Who said: “Where else could a guy with an IQ like mine make this much money?”

Put to sweep

Bernie Lincicome of the Rocky Mountain News wasn’t exactly swept up in the excitement of the Broncos’ 16-13 win over the Buccaneers.

“Both teams,” he said, “played with the imagination of broom straw.”

Another sweep

Before they slink away for the winter, the Cubs are still getting an earful.

Here’s what ESPN.com’s Gene Wojciechowski had to say about their performance against the Dodgers:

“The Cubs have become playoff irrelevant, which is the cruelest thing you can say about a team. They simply don’t matter once the leaves change.

“The Cubs were outscored 20-6. They might as well have been waving rhythmic gymnastics ribbons at the plate.”

Lunar eclipse

The New York Rangers swept a pair of NHL games from the Tampa Bay Lightning in the Czech Republic over the weekend. Why there? The New York Daily News’ Mike Lupica explained: “The Rangers opened up in Prague because apparently the moon was booked.”

Fast talker

NASCAR driver Carl Edwards, who caused a multi-car pileup during Sunday’s race at Talladega Superspeedway, took full blame.

“I always worry about the idiots when I come here,” he said, “and today it was me.”

Trivia answer

Golfer Hubert “Hubie” Green.

And finally

From Dave Thomas of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram: “Al Davis and the Raiders sure do put the ‘fun’ in ‘dysfunctional,’ don’t they?”

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grahame.jones@latimes.com