Bill’s Excellent Adventure : From Sea World and San Diego Zoo to Down-Home Eateries and the World’s Only Biker Comedian, Everyone Wants Time With Clintons

If this presidential vacation were a movie it would be called “Inviting Bill.”

Everyone, it seems, wants President Clinton, Hillary Rodham Clinton, daughter Chelsea and even Chelsea’s unidentified school friend to come calling for a little fun and conversation.

The barest rumor that the Clintons might be en route is enough to make usually unflappable institutions such as Sea World, which hosts 3 million visitors a year, snap to.

The aquatic theme park began readying for a possible visit after Sea World officials heard a media-fanned rumor that 14-year-old Chelsea wants to become a marine biologist. Shamu, the park’s headlining killer whale, was put on alert for a possible VIP visit.

“We’re ready to give them a grand tour, behind the scenes, up close to Shamu, everything,” Sea World spokeswoman Diane Oaks said.

The San Diego Zoo, the city’s most popular tourist attraction, is gathering zoo souvenirs and working with its Washington lobbyist in hopes of luring the Clintons to the zoo. A special glass sculpture of an eagle, with appropriate inscription, is being prepared for the President, just in case.

If they do visit the zoo, and if, perchance, a member of the First Family asks why the panda grotto is empty and forlorn, zoo officials will be pleased to explain that the Clinton Administration’s secretary of the Interior is blocking the importation of two pandas from a Chinese zoo for a breeding and education program.

If the Clintons are hungry, Arkansas House, a down-home barbecue joint in blue-collar La Mesa, stands prepared to serve pork ribs, rotisserie chicken, sweet potato pie, gumbo and more. This is friendly political turf.

There is a picture of the President and First Lady in the window. The special this week is the Clinton Dog, an all-beef frank smothered in chili, cole slaw and mustard.

“I grew up eating them that way and I’m sure President Clinton did too,” said owner and former Clinton-Gore volunteer Karen Huff, who once lived in Pine Bluff, Ark., and opened the 12-stool eatery four months ago.

Huff, who attended the President’s inauguration, says she is suffered through lots of jokes from customers about the Clinton Dog, like the guy who said “Clinton Dog? That must mean it’s not what it appears to be.” Huff has been known to show such jokers the door.

Last Saturday the Secret Service paid a visit, leading Huff to believe her invitation to her political idol has a chance of being accepted. One agent said they were acting as the President’s food tasters.

If the President gets antsy while staying in Coronado and wants to slip out for a little late-night partying, a group of politically active motorcyclists has invited him to a fund-raiser at a honky-tonk in downtown San Diego called Checkers. If he brings his saxophone, he can play a lick or two with the Blonde Bruce Band. If not, he can listen to the humor of Wild Willy Parsons, billed as the world’s only biker comedian.

“We’re having a kick-butt, rock ‘n’ roll comedy party,” said biker leader New York Myke in his official invitation to Clinton. “I’ll be honest with you. I’m not your biggest fan--might even be your loudest detractor. But you’re our President. Come on down and bring Hillary. Just tell them at the door you know New York Myke.”

The bikers would like to lay a little message on Clinton about the perfidy of helmet laws. They were buoyed when they saw pictures on television of Chelsea and her girlfriend riding their bicycles Monday--without helmets.

“We’d like to think he feels helmets are a matter of choice,” said biker Steven (Red) Barron, “and so he let Chelsea make her own decision.”

Numerous golfers--including politicians and military brass--have been inviting Clinton to hit the local links. One presidential aide said the would-be foursomes are claiming to be “friends of friends of friends” of the President.

So far, nothing has worked. None of the supplicants were included in Tuesday’s golf outing at Coronado’s North Island Naval Air Station course.

San Diego-area politicians have been waiting at their phones hoping they might be summoned to a presidential audience, jog or snack. Some have not been content to wait.

San Diego Councilman Juan Carlos Vargas on Monday morning stood in the street outside the seaside manse where the Clintons are staying and waved a sign reading: “President Clinton, We Need the NAFTA Train,” a reference to a proposed $7-million trans-border train line.

As Clinton left in a limousine, he gave a thumb’s up to Vargas.

The gesture was enough to encourage Vargas to return Tuesday. Arriving at 5:30 a.m., Vargas was ready with his sign when Clinton emerged for a jog at 7 a.m.

This time, Clinton provided a thumb’s up and a soothing, “I know, I know.” Vargas counted that as progress and vows to return Wednesday at daybreak.

“All I want is two minutes,” Vargas said. “I’ll even jog with him in my suit.”

Times staff writer Paul Richter contributed to this story.