BASEBALL DAILY REPORT : DODGERS : Strawberry Says Back Injury Was Key

He has said the same things before--during spring training, after he got out of the Smithers Clinic for treatment of alcohol abuse; when he came to the Dodgers before the 1991 season. But Darryl Strawberry believes he can stay drug free and sober this time, though he acknowledges he is “scared daily.”

Strawberry, who completed a drug-abuse program May 4 at the Betty Ford Center, says that staying in the after-care program will make the difference this time, although he knows the criticism and doubts of others continue.

“(Giant Manager) Dusty Baker told me to walk proud and hold my head up high and deal with things,” Strawberry said. “The important thing is that I didn’t hurt anybody but myself. Everybody said I let them down, but I didn’t.

” . . . I wasn’t hurting the Dodgers, the Los Angeles fans or the San Francisco fans, I was hurting myself, I was dying inside.”

Strawberry, who is tested for drugs three times a week, says there were periods over the last nine years when he was clean, such as this spring, when his work ethic and performance were praised by his peers, “but the addiction was always there.”

His level of addiction increased, he said, when he suffered a back injury and couldn’t play, a situation he said overwhelmed him.

“I’m not taking anything away from the Dodgers or (executive) Fred Claire or Mr. (owner Walter) O’Malley, but this (his addiction) was something a little bit more powerful than they could handle,” Strawberry said.

Strawberry believes one of the reasons for the criticism is because of the money he was earning from the Dodgers when he was injured. Ironically, the Dodgers, who paid Strawberry $642,857 this season before the settlement, paid him another $4,857,143 to buy him out. In essence, the Dodgers are paying Strawberry more than $5 million to play for the Giants.

“All I know is that if a man settles with a player and pays him a substantial amount of money, that player should not have a right to come back and defeat that owner,” outfielder Brett Butler said. “Somehow, it just doesn’t seem right.”