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We’ve heard of a candidate being buried,...

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We’ve heard of a candidate being buried, but . . .

A friend of ours was a bit surprised when notified that his voting precinct for the March 26 primary will be Brothers Funeral Directors mortuary in Long Beach. No problem, we told him. Just take a few precautions: (1) Don’t wear your best suit, (2) Be careful which curtain you open, (3) Step lively if you hear organ music, and (4) When you’re told to put your ballot in the box, make sure it isn’t the one lined with satin.

WHICH REMINDS US: One of the questions we’re often asked about Brothers Funeral Directors by readers is, “Steve, does the mortuary owned and operated by Burr & Decatur Dilday have any connection with the Original Dilday Family Funeral Directors?” (see photo for answer).

The mortuary sign resulted from a legal settlement after part of the family business was sold. “One thing about that sign,” says funeral director Bill Bowers. “People remember it.”

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KNOCK ‘EM DEAD: In addition to knocking people around in a ring, boxer George Foreman starred in a sitcom, “George,” and is currently a host of “Inside Out,” a variety show on the Disney Channel. The Hollywood credits of some other fighters:

* Muhammad Ali: title role in 1977 film “The Greatest”; his recording, “I Am the Greatest” (as Cassius Clay) was nominated for a Grammy in 1963.

* Ken Norton Sr.: Movies “Mandingo” (1975) and “Drum” (1976).

* Max Baer: “The Prizefighter and the Lady,” 1933 (fought fellow boxer Primo Carnera in the film a few months before the two fought for real for the heavyweight title; Baer won in both cases).

* Primo Carnera: “Mighty Joe Young,” 1949 (felled by the ape).

* Slapsie Maxie Rosenbloom: the “Joe Palooka” movies; also owned L.A. nightclub called Slapsie Maxie’s, where he performed stand-up comedy.

* Lou Nova: 28 movies, three Broadway plays and several poetry recitals. Once while he was reading “The Shooting of Dan McGrew,” he was interrupted by a spectator who cried, “They shot the wrong man!”

* Packy East: A heckuva lot of films, TV shows under the name of Bob Hope.

WAILING NEWS: Times columnist Scott Harris and your Only in L.A. columnist were recently criticized by the Daily News of L.A. for discussing a tongue-in-cheek contest aimed at giving the San Fernando Valley a new name. (The winner, you may recall, was: “Twentynine Malls.”)

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We were both accused of having “contempt and disdain for the people of the Valley” by one Daily News columnist. Actually, the contest was in keeping with the tradition of Southern Californians poking fun at themselves.

Apparently, residents of the Valley have a better sense of humor than the Daily News pundits. Of the top 10 finishers in the contest, nine live in the Valley.

And the 10th used to write for the Daily News.

GREAT IF YOU CAN FIND A TAILOR WITH A SAW: Mike Hix of Redlands saw this ad in a local newspaper for a suit that might give the wearer slivers.

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Phil Frankenfeld thought it a true L.A. moment when Kato Kaelin said in his deposition that he was once so upset with O.J. Simpson’s angry tone that he had to use Simpson’s hot tub to recover.

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