‘Gold Diggers’ contains no comedic nuggets

Well, it’s not as if National Lampoon’s good name hasn’t previously been besmirched on a movie or television screen. A cursory search of the Internet Movie Database turns up 20 titles staking claim to the satirical magazine’s legacy, and with the exception of “Animal House” and, possibly, the first installment of “Vacation,” most are not worth a second (or even a first) look.

Following in that dubious tradition is “National Lampoon’s Gold Diggers,” which by comparison makes the last theatrically released offering to bear the brand, “Van Wilder,” seem like it was directed by Billy Wilder.

Will Friedle (“Boy Meets World”) and Chris Owen (“American Pie”) star as a pair of inept con men who concoct a scheme to swindle septuagenarian condom heiresses Renee Taylor and Louise Lasser out of their fortune. Unfortunately for the would-be crooks, the ladies are broke and have a scam of their own in mind involving marriage, insurance and a double-homicide.

What follows is a series of lame attempts at murder and comedy and a very long 82 minutes.

Written and directed by Gary Preisler, an industry executive, “Gold Diggers” is a one-gag movie and that one gag isn’t funny. Taylor and Lasser are reduced to playing sex-starved Norma Desmonds, and while Friedle and Owen are certainly game, their plan is a waste of everyone’s time, especially the audience’s.

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‘National Lampoon’s Gold Diggers’

MPAA rating: PG-13 for crude and sexual humor, and some drug-related material

Times guidelines: Murder, mayhem and geriatric flatulence

Will Friedle...Cal

Chris Owen...Lenny

Renee Taylor...Betty

Louise Lasser...Doris

A Voyage Entertainment & Delfino Entertainment presentation of a Don Ashley production. Writer-producer-director Gary Preisler. Producers Don Ashley, Amy Greenspun. Executive producers Leland Preisler, Charles V. Kinstler, Brian Greenspun. Cinematographer Tom Callaway. Editor Robert Brakey. Costume designer Ellen Falguiere. Production designer Terrence Foster. Running time:

1 hour, 22 minutes.

In general release.