He give pranks for memories
Angels beware. Your new teammate, Torii Hunter, is a practical joker.
David Ortiz of the Boston Red Sox, in a taped interview with Bob Costas that will air Tuesday night on HBO’s “Costas Now,” talks about what Corey Koskie and Hunter did to him when all three played for the Minnesota Twins a few years ago.
“They put peanut butter and jelly . . . on my underwear,” Ortiz says. “I was in a rush, so I put my underwear on. And I walked out of the clubhouse, and I was feeling funny. So . . . “
Costas: “I can’t imagine why.”
Ortiz: “I walked back in, and it was either people on the ground just dying laughing, or people running. But I was going to kill somebody.”
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Trivia time
Two former UCLA basketball players served as game commentators on the Lakers with the late Chick Hearn. Name them.
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Shocking news
Dennis Miller noted on his “Sports Filtered” show on Versus last week that Michael Vick spent Thanksgiving at the Northern Neck Regional Jail in Warsaw, Va.
“Prison officials say they’re not treating their celebrity inmate any differently,” Miller said, “although they did allow him the small joy of electrocuting the turkey.”
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Forging ahead
ESPN’s Ron Jaworski, comparing the high-scoring New England Patriots with the ball-control 1972 Miami Dolphins, said on a conference call with reporters that the Dolphins’ approach was “real blacksmith football.” Explained Jaworski: “They were just going to hammer you with the running game.”
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Real and unreal
According to an NFL Network report, the Philadelphia Eagles were demanding three first-round draft picks in exchange for quarterback Donovan McNabb.
“See, that’s the difference between real life and Fantasy League,” wrote Jeff Schultz of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. “In one [fantasy] league I’m in, an owner is offering McNabb to anyone who wants him for any marginally useful player.”
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Erring it out
“I don’t want to say that the Baltimore Ravens’ offense is bad,” comedy writer Alex Kaseberg says, “but on Thanksgiving, when they passed the turkey, it was intercepted and returned for a touchdown.”
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Timing is off
Charles Barkley, as a guest on Dan Patrick’s nationally syndicated radio show heard in L.A. on KLAC 570, talked about his old pal Michael Jordan reportedly losing more than $150 million in his divorce settlement.
“I was going to call him to borrow money, but I think I’ll hold off on that,” Barkley said.
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Home sweet home
Adam Schefter of NFL Network recently visited the Dallas home of colleague Deion Sanders. Schefter told Fox Sports radio: “All I can say is it’s a cross between the Bellagio and Dave and Buster’s.”
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Bashing ‘Bama
Doug Segrest of the Birmingham News, on reeling Alabama, which ended its season with four losses and is now looking at a possible berth in the low-rent Independence Bowl for the third time in seven seasons: “Alabama has spent more time in Shreveport than a traveling vacuum salesman.”
On Nov. 17, after the Crimson Tide lost to Louisiana Monroe, Coach Nick Saban likened it to other catastrophic events such as 9/11 and Pearl Harbor. Noted the Miami Herald’s Greg Cote: “Good thing about Nick is, even in tough times, he keeps his perspective.”
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Trivia answer
Lynn Shackelford and Keith Erickson.
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And finally
On NBC’s NFL studio show last Sunday, the geographically challenged Keith Olbermann questioned why the Denver Broncos would kick to the Chicago Bears’ Devin Hester, who returned a punt and a kickoff for touchdowns.
“Do they not get the highlights west of the Rockies?” Olbermann wondered.
Good line, except Denver is located just east of the Rockies.
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Go beyond the scoreboard
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