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‘Hell’s Kitchen,’ ‘MasterChef’ recap: No one insults like Ramsay

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Each season on “Hell’s Kitchen,” there comes a magical moment. A turning point. Something happens that makes you sit up and take notice of it all.

You know what I’m talking about, right? The moment when Gordon Ramsay unveils an insult like none other. There’s all the times he calls a competitor a “donkey,” “cow” or a “doughnut,” of course. He’s been known to throw the B-word around quite a bit. And let’s not forget the time he told a competitor she looked like a “jumped-up little cave woman.” (A personal favorite, even though I still don’t know what it means.)

But this week, “Hell’s Kitchen” fans were introduced to two new insults. He called Clemenza Caserta a “baby rhino.” And he said Barbie Marshall was like an “appendix” that her teammates were eager to surgically remove.

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Spot on, chef!

The latest challenge had the competitors cooking for a roomful of newly sworn in U.S. citizens. And Ramsay was cursing up a blue streak because neither team seemed able to serve up the simple dishes, such as a Cobb salad, and grilled cheese sandwich.

Nothing says “Welcome to America” like poorly made pizza and raw sliders.

Ultimately, the women’s team was placed on the chopping block and it was Briana Swanson’s turn to go home. Maybe it was all that white-blond hair and ghostly pallor. But she seemed to epitomize Ramsay’s complaint that the women were disappearing from the competition.

Over on “MasterChef,” we were treated to one more night of auditions and leg pulling.

We reached for the Kleenex when Joe Bastianich cast the deciding vote against Stacey Amagrande, who hails from Apple Valley (the land of the “stuck up, ... up or knocked up,” we learn) and is early in her journey to sober living. And then we cheered when he was urged to backtrack.

He tracked down Stacey in the green room and admitted: “For the first time ever, I re-tasted it, I’m changing my mind.” And thus bestowed a white apron on her.

Let’s get to the competition!

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Join Rene Lynch on Google+ or Twitter. Email: rene.lynch@latimes.com

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