Opinion
Columbine, O Magazine and suicide
An article in Oprah Winfrey's publication by Susan Klebold -- whose son was one of the high school shooters 10 years ago -- seems to diminish the enormity of the incident.
The November issue of O Magazine (that's the Oprah Magazine) features a series of articles about how to be "your true self," a guide to do-it-yourself hair coloring and -- thud -- an essay by Susan Klebold. In April 1999, her son, Dylan, along with his classmate, Eric Harris, killed 12 students, a teacher and themselves in a massacre that would thereafter be known simply as Columbine, the deadliest high school shooting in the nation's history.
Even for the indomitable Oprah Winfrey, Klebold must have been a real "get." Klebold had apparently turned down repeated interview requests over the years, and a spokesperson announced that she has no plans to appear on "The Oprah Winfrey Show," nor was she paid for the article.
"I'd had no inkling of the battle Dylan was waging in his mind," Klebold wrote, admitting that even though a teacher had become alarmed by Dylan's paper about a man in a black trench coat who murders nine students, friends and family remained convinced for months after the attack that he hadn't meant to hurt anyone. Meanwhile, Susan Klebold was "nearly insane with sorrow for the suffering my son had caused, and with grief for the child I'd lost. Much of the time I felt that I could not breathe, and I often wished that I would die."
What's notable about the essay, aside from the way the details remain jaw-dropping even 10 years later, is Klebold's decision to couch it as a form of suicide awareness. The last several paragraphs are largely devoted to various statistics about suicide, and Klebold even provides the phone number for the national suicide prevention "lifeline." "I hope that, by reading of my experience, someone will see what I missed," she writes.
We heard a lot about Columbine last April, the 10-year anniversary of the event. In his exhaustively researched book on the event, author Dave Cullen examined how the facts of what happened were so misrepresented and so misconstrued by the public that a set of myths arose that came to define the entire notion of disaffected adolescence, even if they had little to do with the event itself. Contrary to what was widely reported, the shooters were not members of a "trench coat mafia" who targeted jocks and other popular kids in their rampage. Instead, it seems fairly clear that Harris met the clinical definition of a psychopath, and Klebold's suicidal depression made him vulnerable to Harris' influence. Though they weren't members of the "in crowd," they had plenty of friends and weren't widely seen as outcasts. Despite countless rumors otherwise, their victims were random.
But there was a reason the rumors gained such traction. It's easier to believe in the idea of a trench coat mafia and to make pat assumptions about teenagers and their social hierarchy than it is to come to terms with the idea that one kid would kill for the sake of killing and another would so willingly go along for the ride.
And it's hard not to see Susan Klebold's essay as, if not a continuation of the myths, an extension of the impulse that causes people to repeat them. Though she comes across as a sincere and thoughtful woman, the net effect of the whole endeavor seems like a form of pandering -- to readers' sympathies and, more important, to the American obsession with "closure." We are not, after all, a culture that is particularly adept at accepting the more irrational aspects of tragedy, the randomness of death, the unknowability of a criminal's motives. Instead, we like to make sense of it all, to learn from mistakes, to erect memorials, observe anniversaries and offer up platitudes about finding peace.
Though Klebold avoids words such as "closure" in her essay (and, indeed, it is clear she will never find peace), her choice to view her son chiefly through the lens of suicide -- and, to boot, to do it in O Magazine -- diminishes the enormity of what really happened. The ostensible reason for her article appearing now is that Nov. 21 is National Survivors of Suicide Day. But imagine being the mother of a suicide victim who didn't happen to take 13 people along with him. Would you want to commemorate Nov. 21 with Susan Klebold? Or would you prefer she speak solely for herself, even if what she had to say offered no comfort because it fit no familiar idiom and offered no resolution?
My guess is the latter. Besides, as Dylan himself demonstrated in a video he and Harris made just before they started shooting, attempts at closure can be appallingly hollow. "I just wanted to apologize to you guys for any crap this might instigate," he said to his parents.
Closure? Not even close.
mdaum@latimescolumnists.com
She wrote what she was feeling and her feelings are not to be judged by us. I can't begin to imagine what it would feel like to be this woman. God bless her.
jjfox@mac.com (10/26/2009, 8:46 PM )
I agree with the points you make here. I read Mrs. Klebolds article and I actually found it a bit offensive that it seemed to declare depression and suicide as the reasons why this tragedy happened. Where do terrorism and homicide fit in that?
It also seemed to me that the essay put some fault on the teacher who brought the "disturbing" essay to her attention, but didn't have the paper with her at the time of their conference, and guidance counselors who also didn't follow up with her about their concerns. Seemed to me that it was Mrs. Klebolds job to be proactive and follow up with the teacher and counselor about her child once she was made aware there were issues.
I was also surprised to read that Klebold and Harris had been arrested previously. The first time Klebold had ever been in trouble with the law. He was forbidden to see Harris, but obviously at some point that changed.
Although I do have compassion for this mother, and the mothers of the innocent victims, I'm not sure what the purpose of that essay was. If it was truly to bring suicide awareness it fell flat. It does seem to me that even now, this mother is still a bit in denial. There was way more going on there than depression and a suicidal thoughts.
petals121 (10/26/2009, 8:07 AM )
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I saw Mrs.Klebold's article as a heartfelt and anguished essay by a mother with tremendous guilt at having missed the signs of her child having been depressed and suicidal, and that these mental conditions most likely caused him to commit those murders. The guilt that she felt and still continues to feel over her son's death and those of the ones he killed poured out of her words, to me at least. That she chose the angle of suicide in regards to writing that article is something that I have no problems with whatsoever. She seems to believe that if Dylan's depression had not gone undiagnosed then maybe what happened at Columbine could have been prevented. That makes some sense to me. Too bad it doesn't for you.
You mention the fact that Mrs. Klebold never used the word "closure" in her article, seeming to mock the word and how tritely it is used sometimes. I don't like to hear it used so often either and never for a second did I think that was what Mrs. Klebold was trying to achieve in her article. Again, I saw the piece as a mother expressing anguish over her son's death and the deaths of the people he killed.
Many people have wanted to hear from either Dylan's or Eric's parents for years now and when we finally do the parent is castigated and accused of "pandering" for writing what was in her heart and head. What's wrong with you? That was a poor opinion piece by you.
Bookworm999 (10/27/2009, 5:33 PM )