Opinion
Get Opinion in your inbox -- sign up for our weekly newsletter
Opinion L.A.
Opinion Opinion L.A.

If California splits into six states, NorCal could be Cannabis Island

Call it six degrees of proposed separation.

Tim Draper, a megabucks Silicon Valley venture capitalist, thinks California is too big a state to be run effectively or responsive politically (kind of like a massive Silicon Valley tech company). So he’s been pushing for a voter initiative that would split California into six separate states. The secretary of state has cleared the petitions for circulation, so keep an eye open for techies with clipboards outside your local grocery store.

It’s a far-fetched idea, and lord knows it’s not the first time Californians have entertained the idea of a political divorce. Even if voters decide we’ve reached the point of irreconcilable differences, the Legislature would still have to approve dismembering the state, under Article IV, Section 3 of the U.S. Constitution. Congress would have to approve it too, and we know what an impossibility is it to get it to agree on anything.

So this splintering of the Golden State into a handful of ingots is a long shot. Not to mention a bad idea and a waste of time, resources and energy. But it does let the imagination run free, kind of like buying lottery tickets.

Draper’s proposal already contains the names of the new states, but they lack for creativity. They are, from south to north, South California, West California, Central California, Silicon Valley (which would include San Francisco), North California and finally, and tied to a long-running dream of dissolution, Jefferson. (We should be grateful, I suppose, that he doesn’t propose Draper as the name for the Silicon Valley slice).

Boring. If we’re going to reinvent the place, let’s give it some names with pizazz. Silicon Valley, for instance, could be Restart Now. Or, since it includes San Francisco, Silicon Valley could be The Land of the Giants. Central Valley: Almondia. Or Cough, Cough. Jefferson, in the far north? Cannabis Island.

There’s lots of potential.

Same for the flags. Who gets to keep the bear? Would Silicon Valley adopt the Jolly Roger? Could South California go with a freeway overlay?

The comments section is open for suggestions.

ALSO:

Gun control made harder in California

The Iran I saw — in 781 days in Evin Prison

A costly pain the neck, and what it says about healthcare in the U.S.

Follow Scott Martelle on Twitter @smartelle

Copyright © 2015, Los Angeles Times
Related Content
  • Good news for California's unemployed: Someone now may answer the phone

    Good news for California's unemployed: Someone now may answer the phone

    In what can only be viewed as good news for Californians trying to wrestle with jobless benefits, state officials said Friday that they would ramp up staffing at the Employment Development Department, where there aren’t even enough bodies to answer the phones.

  • Nudity and other water-saving tips for California's epochal drought

    Nudity and other water-saving tips for California's epochal drought

    If you’re not at least a little panicky, then you’re not paying attention. California is in a state of slow-moving emergency. The governor, Jerry Brown, made it official last week: Rainfall is pitiable, snowpack and reservoir levels deplorable. We have the worst drought on record, the record being...

  • The return of the bloviator

    The return of the bloviator

    As Donald Trump surges, so does "bloviate." "The bloviating billionaire" — it's clearly an alliteration whose time has come. But there's hardly a candidate or commentator who hasn't been labeled with the word. Thirty years ago it was dated slang; now it's seen as the prevailing vice of our public...

  • No to the Iran deal means no to U.S. credibility

    No to the Iran deal means no to U.S. credibility

    A striking feature of the debate raging among American politicians over the Iran nuclear agreement is the virtual absence of references to international law. Republican presidential candidates compete as to who among them, if elected president, would be quickest to renounce the agreement, as if...

  • Doesn't the 1st Amendment apply outside the Supreme Court?

    Doesn't the 1st Amendment apply outside the Supreme Court?

    From race relations to abortion to gay marriage, the Supreme Court plays a crucial role in American life. So it's understandable that activists want to demonstrate on the grand plaza in front of the court's building. Such a majestic backdrop lends force to a protest and increases the possibility...

  • How our healthcare system can be deadly to the elderly

    How our healthcare system can be deadly to the elderly

    The nation's healthcare system is endangering the elderly. But few outside the geriatric medical community seem to notice.

Comments
Loading
70°