Why stay-at-home parents do right by their kids

To the editor: Jessica Grose failed to address the unique importance of the first two pre-verbal years. It is during this period that 80% of brain development occurs, and a child develops the ability to trust and to love and a sense of optimism. ("No need for moms to stay at home," op-ed, April 2)

Predictable and continuous care by a parent creates a secure attachment. This allows a child to feel protected and valued. Clinicians have found that children with early attachment deficits may have difficulty in school, obeying the law and in forming lasting relationships.


In contrast, older children who have language are able to understand the coming and going of working parents and to deal with the stress of predictable separations, day care and multiple caregivers.

The best investment any parent will ever make is acting as the child's primary care giver from birth until age 2.

Isabelle Fox, Sherman Oaks

The writer, a psychotherapist, is the author of "Being There: The Benefits of a Stay-At-Home Parent."


To the editor: I liked this part from Grose's piece about mothers' decisions to stay with their children or work outside the home: "The belief that women are the essential parent was related to lower life satisfaction."

This myth starts early in our culture. For instance, why are there so many baby showers in which only the mom is celebrated and only other women are invited? Where is dad and the other dads, uncles, brothers and grandpa?

As John Oliver would say, "Why is this still a thing?"

Janet King, San Diego

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