All-Ego Sports Team

Mark Cuban, team owner. Even among the frat house of fools who run the nation’s sports teams, Cuban is a standout — for his harassment of NBA officials to the recent insider trading allegations. Mark, take your Ritalin. A steady hand like yours is probably just what the Chicago Cubs need.   (Mark J. Terrill / Associated Press)

Kobe Bryant, basketball player. Men are from Venus, Kobe’s from Mars. His behavior during the Olympics went a long way toward improving his image. But an All-Ego team without Kobe would be like an All-Midget team without ... well, me.   (Alex Gallardo / Los Angeles Times)

The Duke student section. Listen up, you little punks. Pride in your team is one thing. But you’ve helped turn college hoops into a rancorous R-rated spectacle, from which mothers shield their young ’uns. I guess sportsmanship wasn’t an essay question on the SATs.  (Craig Jones / Allsport)

Charlie Weis, football coach. Casts about the gridiron like McClernand at Vicksburg. Certainly not the first coach at Notre Dame with a God complex, just the lamest. Call him the Round Mound of Hallowed Ground.  (Rob Carr / Associated Press)

Barry Bonds, baseball player. He’s the most prolific home run hitter of all time and still can’t get a gig. Why? Maybe it’s because he’s clubhouse poison. Maybe because he may be headed for jail. Was Willie Mays really his godfather? What happened there?   (Denis Poroy / Associated Press)

Al Davis, team owner. If ego were chocolate, he’d be Hershey, Pa. Once upon a time, his awful behind-the-scenes antics produced nasty but effective teams. Now his awful behind-the-scene antics produce laughably bad teams. Compared with this guy, Attila the Hun was a cupcake.   (Jed Jacobsohn / Getty Images)