Across America, Fish by Fish

I was about to take a bite of the sesame crusted salmon at the Chart House restaurant on PCH when my mind drifted to thoughts of torture.

I was not thinking of the death of the fish. There are enough animal activists throughout L.A. weeping and praying over that kind of thing.

Going through my mind was what if I was doomed to eat at the Chart House every day for the rest of my life? What if they tied me up and kept stuffing crusted salmon down my throat?

It was a dark fantasy born of an interview with two Westside ladies named Lee and Maureen, whose last names they wished to remain private.

They were dining at the PCH Chart House about six years ago when they noticed a card on the table that announced a contest to win an around-the-world trip. All you had to do was eat at every one of the 65 Chart Houses in the country.

This is a chain created by a couple of surfers, so I hadn’t expected its menu to reflect a good deal of imagination when I dined there for the first time.

Surprisingly, however, the food is pretty good . . . but it’s also much the same at every Chart House in America. It would not be difficult to run out of options if you ate at all 65, thus giving credence to the crusted salmon torture. But Lee and Maureen did it, and now they’re going around the world.

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Due to the kind of lawyering she does, Maureen travels a good deal. She had to eat somewhere. Why not the Chart House?

Initially, one had to spend at least $10 at each of the restaurants, an amount upped to $25 midway in the contest. Lee would accompany Maureen occasionally, which made it easier.

Annapolis, Maryland, was first. At each Chart House Maureen had to have a “passport” stamped, which would alert its staff to the fact that she was going for the Big Win. Their go-for-it enthusiasm was contagious and the two women soon began seeing the world journey as a serious possibility.

The extent of their commitment became obvious at the nine Chart Houses in Florida. In one weekend, they did them all.

“We’d wait for the first one to open and go there for appetizers,” Maureen says, recalling the eating blitz. “For dinner, we’d hit a second Chart House, for dessert a third.”

On a trip from Idaho, they took the long way home and, between flights in Portland, visited a Chart House there and in Vancouver, Washington.

They raced from the airport in a taxi, had appetizers in Portland and then sped off in the waiting cab to Vancouver. A waiter phoned their dinner order ahead. It was ready when they got there. “By then,” Lee said somewhat wistfully, “we knew the menu by heart.”

But fish by fish, they were closing in on their goal.

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In Rhode Island, a Chart House was closed because of a broken water heater, but the manager served them cold hors d’oeuvres, stamped Maureen’s passport and took them to dinner elsewhere.

The first 40 Chart Houses were visited on business trips. But for the next 25, Maureen and Lee were on their own. They were determined to win at any cost.

In Colorado, they risked their lives getting to a Chart House, Maureen says. En route to Denver, they hit a blinding snow storm in the Rockies. They could turn back or press on. Like Columbus facing the unknown, they said, “Sail on!” Well, drive on. They made it through the storm. Check off Denver.

To Hawaii, Puerto Rico, the Virgin Islands, New York and up and down California they went. The food, they said, had become boring. How much sesame crusted salmon can you eat? But they praised the staff for cheering them on and helping them win.

Their worst meal was in San Juan, Puerto Rico. When they complained, the manager insisted on comping them. But they were three days away from the completion deadline and had to pay in order to qualify. So they came back the next night, ate the food again, and this time he took their money.

On January 18, 1999, victory. Maureen had won a trip for two worth a total of $5,000. They had visited 65 Chart Houses in 20 states. Factoring in the cost of the food, lodging and transportation, they had probably spent more winning the tickets than if they’d just bought them in the first place.

But fun counts for something. In November, they’ll head to Europe, Africa and beyond. “It was all born out of a flight of fancy,” Maureen says, “and created bigger dreams than we thought we had.”

The contest is over, so there’s no need for anyone to spend a lot of time at Chart Houses. Unless, of course, a lifetime of crusted salmon appeals to you.

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Al Martinez’s column appears Sundays and Wednesdays. He can be reached online at al.martinez@latimes.com