Call Them Even: He Stole the Cell Phone, but Gave the Store His Address

Maybe it seemed like the perfect time to shoplift the cell phone. After all, the clerk in the electronics store had gone into the back to run a credit check and the would-be buyer was alone with the gadget. So he skedaddled with it.

Just one problem, reported the Paramount newsletter, City Talk. The thief had already put down his correct address on the credit application, which made the investigative work of the L.A. County Sheriff’s Department that much easier.

Incidentally, the shoplifter was not an actor.

*

The jury is still out on this one, though: Jean McTernan of L.A. noticed on her jury summons that dead people who can’t prove they’re dead get only a one-year reprieve from duty (see accompanying).

*

Food for thought: “I’ve been invited to a number of weddings where the reception caterers have offered interesting and varied menu selections,” said Lee Ruttenberg of West L.A., “but this one seemed a bit odd” (see accompanying).

I would add that many people don’t know what to do with children during weddings, but this strikes me as a really extreme concept.

*

Lawsuits, wetsuits, etc.: California Lawyer magazine was ripped by a reader over an article about the L.A.-area Surfing Lawyers Assn. (there really is such a group).

The magazine remarked that surfers are “type L, as in laid back.”

But a San Diego reader argued that that this was a shallow analysis, declaring that “traditional short-board surfing is one of the most aggressive, hard-charging sports there is and always attracts type-A personalities.”

The reader sneered that the wave-riding lawyers are “apparently into longboard surfing, which is what guys who can’t surf do, like driving an RV around an Indy track.” And, before he ran out of breath, he added “that a surfing lawyer organization already exists: Surfrider Foundation.”

I just hope these two groups can settle their differences without paddling into court.

*

Slip-and-fall possibilities here: Last week this column discussed banana museums in Germany and banana artists in Canada. In my never-ending coverage of this important fruit, I bring you a snapshot that Wendy Mollett of Studio City brought back from North Carolina (see photo).

As she observed, “it puts a new twist on BYOB.”

*

miscelLAny: The writers of the movie “Santa Clause 2” worked a Hollywood joke into one scene where Santa is told that someone he knows is on the “naughty list.” “It’s Charlie,” an elf explains.

“Sheen?” replies Santa. “I thought he’d straightened out.” It turns out that this Charlie is not the bad-boy actor but the bad-boy son of Santa.

*

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083; by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012; and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.