A Model Way to Run a Tennis Tournament

It doesn’t seem to matter whether they get criticized by the media, the players or both. Tennis tournament organizers in Madrid never met a publicity ploy they didn’t like.

Last year, female models were introduced to replace ball kids, generating pre-tournament headlines and going about their duties in black string vests and tight knee-length skirts. The models returned this week for the men’s tournament, which was to be completed today.

Also this year, organizers threatened to eliminate the men’s doubles event, then retreated after being told not to by the ATP, which runs men’s pro tennis.

Undaunted, organizers have announced that male models will work at the Women’s Tennis Assn. Championships next year when the season-ending tournament moves to Madrid from Los Angeles.

First thought: Does Gucci make tennis shoes?

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Trivia time: Who are the only two players to have hit two pinch-hit homers in the same World Series?

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Rocket man: Brook Larmer, former Newsweek bureau chief in Shanghai who has covered Yao Ming’s court exploits since 1999, has written a book, “Operation Yao Ming.”

Several chapters deal with the Chinese center’s rookie season with the Houston Rockets, detailing his on- and off-court education, including his need to learn a new language.

Intriguing to Yao was the greeting “Waasup.” According to Larmer, that “sounded vaguely like a vulgarity in the Shanghainese dialect and [Yao] used it every time he greeted his new teammates.”

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More Yao: Then there was the time Kelvin Cato asked when Yao would invite the team to his “crib.” Yao explained that he had no furniture.

Cato: “But that’s the best time to throw a party. You can trash the place and nobody will care!”

Larmer explained Yao’s hesitancy: “He wouldn’t be having a party at his house anytime soon, and the reason was more than slightly embarrassing: His mother wouldn’t allow it.”

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Dress code: Hartford Courant columnist Jeff Jacobs, on NBA Commissioner David Stern’s fashion edict: “If you allow us aging white guys to call the sartorial shots, the whole planet will end up in penny loafers and bow ties.”

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Last meal: Perhaps the New Zealand fishing boat the Reaper should be renamed the Grim Reaper, after accidentally catching a great white shark in its nets last week.

“It certainly looked like Jaws when we first saw it,” boat owner Warwick Harris told the New Zealand Herald.

The shark reportedly weighed more than 3,000 pounds and had an “entire bull seal in its stomach.”

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Trivia answer: In 1959, Chuck Essegian of the Dodgers did it against the White Sox. In 1975, Bernie Carbo of the Red Sox did it against the Reds.

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And finally: U.S. cross-country skier Andrew Newell, to Outside magazine, on being a world-class Nordic skier:

“We push our bodies above and beyond what is even considered healthy. I throw up after probably half my races.”