OK guys, watch your kneecaps

Forget ultimate cage fighting, there’s plenty of potential for violence on the ice these days.

But no, not in the NHL. We’re talking about from Evan Lysacek and Johnny Weir, the top men’s figure skaters in the United States.

Weir dropped the gloves recently, telling the New York Times that Lysacek’s style was “a little too fake” and adding, “I just don’t like him.”

Lysacek has tried to triple-axel around such comments but did say, “If this is what it takes for figure skating to attract some attention, I can live with that.”

The solution seems simple. Put them on the ice together, with Tonya Harding and Jeff Gillooly as judges. Call it “Blades of Gory.”

The story seems to write itself. When confronted with the perception that Lysacek has superior athletic abilities while Weir relies on presentation, Weir said, “If he doesn’t want to skate to music that’s pretty and wear a pretty costume, then go rollerblade or skateboard or do one of those extreme sports.”

Get Will Ferrell on the phone.

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Trivia time

What was the result of UCLA’s first football game?

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Just the facts

A quick primer on the UCLA and Texas A&M; men’s basketball programs, which meet today in a second-round NCAA tournament game in Anaheim:

Texas A&M;: Nine NCAA tournament appearances. UCLA: Eleven national titles.

Texas A&M;: Once had a coach named “Bible” -- Dana X. Bible, 1920-27. UCLA: Once had a coach who wrote the bible on college basketball.

Texas A&M;: Former player Darryl McDonald won two titles and was twice the runner-up in the voting for MVP . . . in the NBL -- Australia’s National Basketball League. UCLA: Former player Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, among other things, was pretty darn good as the co-pilot in the movie “Airplane.”

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Duck!

The Clippers’ game against the Dallas Mavericks will be shown live in 3-D at a Dallas theater Tuesday, a “pilot exhibition” of Mavericks owner Mark Cuban, according to the Hollywood Reporter.

“It will be a unique experience for watching sports, concerts and special events that only theaters will be able to offer,” Cuban said.

Yeah, but the Clippers in 3-D? Think of the sore necks as the audience tries dodging all those errant passes.

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Flip-flopper

Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton told Bloomberg this week she would defer making predictions on who’d win the NCAA tournament to her husband.

A spokesman for Bill Clinton, when asked, said, “We’re going to pass.”

Then, in a policy reversal, Clinton gave his Final Four predictions on James Carville’s “60/20 Sports” radio show Friday, picking North Carolina, Memphis, UCLA and Georgetown.

Hmmm, what changed his mind?

Could it be: North Carolina (upcoming primary), Memphis (if Tennessee had been blue in 2000 then we have President Gore), UCLA (big prize in November) and Georgetown (you can’t turn your back on your alma mater).

As to who will win it all, Clinton said, “My heart’s with Georgetown, but my head tells me it’s going to be Carolina or Memphis.”

Well, there go California’s 55 electoral votes.

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Kings . . . uh, Ducks for a day

The Stanley Cup visited Afghanistan this week, part of a morale booster for Canadian troops stationed there.

Well, that settles another bar bet: Where will the Stanley Cup show up first, Afghanistan or the Kings dressing room?

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Trivia answer

The Bruins lost to Manual Arts High, 74-0, in 1919.

That should make the Mississippi Valley State guys feel a little better.

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And finally

After second-seeded Duke avoided being upset in the first round of the NCAA tournament Thursday, Belmont guard Justin Hare told reporters, “We’ll be remembered as the team that almost did it.”

Sorry kid, no one ever read “The Little Engine Who Almost Did It.”

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chris.foster@latimes.com